Correction/Myths and Heroes
Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En basMessage de popy posté le 01-05-2017 à 19:26:47 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
mon oral de Bac d'anglais est dans une semaine. Est-ce que quelqu'un pourrait corriger les fautes s'il vous plait?
Merci beaucoup.
Well, let me consider the following notion : myths and heroes. First, let me give a simple definition of this notion. A myth is an idea or story that is believed by many people – but that is not true – to explain a practice, belief, or natural occurrence. A hero is a person who is admired for great or brave acts or fine qualities. He or she can either be real or fictional. In relation with this notion, the topic of my presentation will be the sixties.
Thus we may wonder what are the revolutions during the 60s which have allowed the appearance of new heroes?
First, during that period, music industry flourished like never before. New bands and new music gender appeared. According to the article from NPR untitled “The real story behind Britain's rock'n'roll”, the rock'n'roll revolution was spreading like wildfire in the United States. The Beatles were leading the way, as well as The Who or the Rolling Stones. They knew a worldwide popularity and it is still true today. With their music, they were influencing the whole world. They were models for people. Moreover, in period of Vietnam war, these bands were spokesperson of the population. The messages delivered through the music reflected the public opinion and made it possible to denounce the Vietnam war, among others. These bands were the heroes of the time. People found themselves in them.
They would never have had such a success in United Kingdom without the pirate radio. Indeed, we learn in the document “The real story behind Britain's rock'n'roll” that except one commercial TV network, all the airwaves were owned by the BBC and they banished rock'n'roll music. That is why some of them hunkering down on old fishing ship anchored off the Eastern coast of England to broadcast illicit tunes of bands as we can see in the movie “The boat that rocked”. In 1964, the first pirate radio “Radio Caroline” went on the air. In mid-60's their signals reached as many as 20 million Brits. However, in 1967 the British government outlawed offshore stations. Pirate radios continued to broadcast. We can see them as heroes to have faced the law. They fought for their right and against a law which they found unjust. Popularity of rock'n'roll music is still expanding in UK today because they had the courage to oppose the Establishment.
This music revolution allowed an open-minded and to affirm freedom of expression because the music can also be committed. This is why all the actors of this revolution are heroes.
Then, during the sixties, London was the fashion capital of the world as we learn it in the document “The times are changing”. Super model such as Twiggy or Mary Quant has revolutionized fashion during the sixties. Mary Quant was the designer of the miniskirt. It's a revolution because miniskirt is revealing women's leg like never before. It is a very strong symbol of liberation of woman. Twiggy embody this revolution. These two women are emblems of 60's. The revolution of the fashion is the first step towards the women's liberation and independence. According to “The times are changing”, during 50's men were men and women were housewives. However, this picture was changing during the sixties partly thanks to Twiggy and Mary Quant. It is what makes her heroines.
To conclude, the different revolutions of the sixties have brought new gender of hero. They are not fictional but real and they contribute to make the world a better place.
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Modifié par lucile83 le 01-05-2017 22:32
Réponse : Correction/Myths and Heroes de laure95, postée le 02-05-2017 à 10:51:54 (S | E)
Bonjour,
- First, let me give (you) a simple definition of this notion.
- Thus we may wonder what are (pas à la bonne place) the revolutions during the 60s which have allowed the appearance of new heroes? (enlever point d'interrogation: interrogative indirecte
- First, during that period, ((article)music industry flourished like never before.
- New bands and new music gender( pluriel) appeared.
- untitled: orthographe.
- these bands were (article)spokesperson (pluriel) of the population.
- in (artcile) United Kingdom without the pirate radio.
- In (article)mid-60's their signals reached as many as 20 million Brits.
- (article)Popularity of rock'n'roll music is still expanding in UK today
- This music revolution (has)allowed an open-minded (people to be open-minded)and to affirm (article)freedom of expression
- Super model (pluriel) such as Twiggy or Mary Quant has (pluriel) revolutionized fashion during the sixties.
- It's (passé) a revolution because (article)miniskirt is revealing women's leg like never before.
- It is a very strong symbol of (article)liberation of woman. Twiggy embody (faute de conjugaison)this revolution.
- These two women are (passé) (article)emblems of (article)60's. The revolution of the fashion is (passé) the first step
- during 50's men were men: ?
- this picture was changing (preterit simple) during the sixties partly thanks to Twiggy and Mary Quant.
To conclude, the different revolutions of the sixties have brought new gender (pluriel) of hero.
Conclusion un peu courte.
Réponse : Correction/Myths and Heroes de popy, postée le 03-05-2017 à 17:41:36 (S | E)
Merci beaucoup!
Une question : quelle est la bonne orthographe de "untitled"? car sur wordreference c'est cette orthographe que j'ai trouvé
Réponse : Correction/Myths and Heroes de laure95, postée le 03-05-2017 à 18:17:41 (S | E)
ENTITLED
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