Correction/ essai
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Message de ulysse posté le 26-11-2016 à 09:47:42 (S | E | F)
Bonjour à tous et à toutes !
Je dois écrire un essai pour mes dossiers d'universités étrangères, mon sujet était "évoquez une expérience qui a entraîné un développement intellectuel chez vous". J'ai commencé brièvement le sujet qui doit comprendre 300 mots mais même en l'ayant relu plusieurs fois je pense qu'il reste quelques erreurs. Je fais donc appel à une âme charitable qui pourrait me venir en aide voire me suggérer quelques améliorations, on a toujours besoin d'un regard extérieur pour vraiment être impartial !
Merci d'avance à celui/ceux qui prendra/prendront le temps et bonne journée à tous
Voici l'essai :
An unexpected event, a move, the first words we read, the meeting of the person that will change our life... all of these several things are likely to engender an intellectual development. Mine, however, certainly happened during my first years as a consciousness, when I was trying to discover the world by my own and wanted to grow as fast as I could.
Whilst I thought reading was already the greatest change that has ever happened to me, allowing me to meet a new universe built by my thought, watching movies actually had a greater impact on my life, and still have.
Movies have viscerally, dramatically, profoundly enabled me to widen my mind, they made me face new cultures, new perceptions of the same world I was living in, but perceived through someone else's eyes. Movies taught me history in another way, helped me to learn english faster than my classmates, recited me a sort of poetry that I had never met.
From the biographical movies about an unrepeatable writer or artist, to the ones dealing with deeply, complex characters switching between reality and fantasy, every movie has something to show you, that you can accept or not. The aim of a movie is not to make your point of view totally change, to make you agree or disagree with an event or social issue.
Movies offer you to choose, whether or not, you let a new perception influence yours, and they constantly help me to mold mine.
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Modifié par lucile83 le 26-11-2016 10:07
Message de ulysse posté le 26-11-2016 à 09:47:42 (S | E | F)
Bonjour à tous et à toutes !
Je dois écrire un essai pour mes dossiers d'universités étrangères, mon sujet était "évoquez une expérience qui a entraîné un développement intellectuel chez vous". J'ai commencé brièvement le sujet qui doit comprendre 300 mots mais même en l'ayant relu plusieurs fois je pense qu'il reste quelques erreurs. Je fais donc appel à une âme charitable qui pourrait me venir en aide voire me suggérer quelques améliorations, on a toujours besoin d'un regard extérieur pour vraiment être impartial !
Merci d'avance à celui/ceux qui prendra/prendront le temps et bonne journée à tous
Voici l'essai :
An unexpected event, a move, the first words we read, the meeting of the person that will change our life... all of these several things are likely to engender an intellectual development. Mine, however, certainly happened during my first years as a consciousness, when I was trying to discover the world by my own and wanted to grow as fast as I could.
Whilst I thought reading was already the greatest change that has ever happened to me, allowing me to meet a new universe built by my thought, watching movies actually had a greater impact on my life, and still have.
Movies have viscerally, dramatically, profoundly enabled me to widen my mind, they made me face new cultures, new perceptions of the same world I was living in, but perceived through someone else's eyes. Movies taught me history in another way, helped me to learn english faster than my classmates, recited me a sort of poetry that I had never met.
From the biographical movies about an unrepeatable writer or artist, to the ones dealing with deeply, complex characters switching between reality and fantasy, every movie has something to show you, that you can accept or not. The aim of a movie is not to make your point of view totally change, to make you agree or disagree with an event or social issue.
Movies offer you to choose, whether or not, you let a new perception influence yours, and they constantly help me to mold mine.
-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 26-11-2016 10:07
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