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Oral/ idea of progress

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Oral/ idea of progress
Message de charlene29 posté le 20-03-2016 à 17:09:48 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
j'aimerais de l'aide pour corriger mes erreurs dans mon texte sur la notion idée de progrès que je vais présenter en anglais.
Merci d'avance.

Let’s talk about the idea of progress. The progress can be defined as a belief that something can evolve in a positive way or can improve. It can be of a technical progress, scientific or social advance which contributes to making the world a better place. But a progress isn’t always good, it can be a negative progress.
In class, we studied this notion through the chapter: the place of women in society.
How has the place of women changed through the century?
To begin, we’re going to see if women have found their place in our society during the Victorian period, especially within the family.
Then, let’s study the position of women during the world war II, more precisely in the workplace.
Finally, we will focus on the place of women in the workplace too but during the 1960’s.
First, we studied an extract of a novel whose title is Dombey and Son and which illustrates the place of women in family in 1848. The author is Charles Dickens. The idea of progress isn’t a positive evolution in this text, but on the contrary it illustrates the negligence of men opposite women in the family during the Victorian period. In this extract there are 4 characters who are Mr Dombey, his wife, their daughter who have 6 and their little son who has just been born. Mrs Dombey is represented only like a wife who give birth to a baby and after she is non-existent. Then, Mr Dombey daughter’s is considered as useless : indeed we don’t know her name, she has not identity in her family and in our society. Her father neglects her because she couldn’t inherit of the family firm’s called “Dombey and son” because she is a girl. In this family, women don’t have a place.
But we also saw another document, which raises the issue of women in Worlds War 2. Thanks to two texts about jobs of women during the war, we examined the entry of women in the workplace. By report of the extract precedent, these texts show an improvement in a positive way for women, it’s a progress during this period. In fact, women have places of work! We learnt that they began to work in factories because they replace men who were called to the war, they work too on the land on farms and there is a public-awareness campaign to encourage women to join the land Army called “Women’s land army”. Then, some women enlisted in the army like nurses for example.
And after the war, we studied a short video called “Secrets of Success in the Workplace for women!” in order to emphasizes what women are supposed to do in the workplace during the 1960’s. This video puts on stage Peggy Olson, who is the main-character and who starts her first day at her job. She needs to learn the “basic rules” at work like should dress for success, make up her face, pay attention to her boss and be careful about her physical appearance. The idea of progress is the place of women in the workplace but this short video gives an image of women superficial, weak and whose only goal is to seduce men and get married for have a better place in the family than in the workplace.
In a nutshell, we can say that the situation of women has improved even if they aren’t still respected, and equality between men and women has not been totally achieved.
In my opinion, it’s already a great progress that women have a place in the workplace among men but through the century in our society we keep always an image of women who embodies silliness or naivety, or of housewife.

-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 21-03-2016 00:09



Réponse: Oral/ idea of progress de lucile83, postée le 21-03-2016 à 00:11:28 (S | E)
anyone?



Réponse: Oral/ idea of progress de laure95, postée le 21-03-2016 à 15:25:59 (S | E)
Bonjour,
- a (THE)belief that something can evolve in a positive way or can improve.
- It can be of(enlever OF) a technical progress, scientific or social advance which contributes to making (TO + INFINITIF) the world a better place. But a (pas d'articleàprogress isn’t always good, it can be a (idem)negative progress.
- To begin, we’re going to see if women have found their place in our society during the Victorian period pas de present perfect avec une date passée)

- In this extract there are 4 characters who are Mr Dombey, his wife, their daughter who have (jamais HAVE pur l'âge!) 6
- like a wife who give birth to a baby: conjugaison.
-indeed we don’t know her name, she has not (article)identity
- the family firm’s: "'s" n'est pas à la bonne place.

- But we also saw another document, which raises the issue of women in (during)Worlds (pas au pluriel)War 2.
- By report of the extract precedent: mal construit.
- it’s a progress during this period: passé.
- In fact, women have places of work!: passé.
-because they replace men: passé.
- they work too on the land on farms and there is a public-awareness campaign to encourage women to join the land Army called “Women’s land army”: passé.
- in order to emphasizes: IN ORDER TO +INFINITIF.
- what women are supposed to do in the workplace during the 1960’s: passé.
-who starts her first day at her job: mal dit.
- She needs to learn the “basic rules” at work like (how she )should dress for success,
-for have: pour + verbe = TO.

- and (article) equality between men and women has not been totally achieved.
- we keep always (ordre des mots) an image of women who embodies (conjugaison)silliness or naivety, or of housewife (pluriel).



Réponse: Oral/ idea of progress de charlene29, postée le 24-03-2016 à 18:29:04 (S | E)
Boujour laure095, merci de votre réponse. Je vous poste ma correction :


Let’s talk about the idea of progress. The progress can be defined as the belief that something can evolve in a positive way or can improve. It can be a technical progress, scientific or social advance which contributes to make the world a better place. But progress isn’t always good, it can be negative progress.
In class, we studied this notion through the chapter: the place of women in society.
How has the place of women changed through the century?
To begin, we’re going to see if women found their place in our society during the Victorian period, especially within the family.
Then, let’s study the position of women during the world war II, more precisely in the workplace.
Finally, we will focus on the place of women in the workplace too but during the 1960’s.
First, we studied an extract of a novel whose title is Dombey and Son and which illustrates the place of women in family in 1848. The author is Charles Dickens. The idea of progress isn’t a positive evolution in this text, but on the contrary it illustrates the negligence of men opposite women in the family during the Victorian period. In this extract there are 4 characters who are Mr Dombey, his wife, their daughter who is 6 and their little son who has just been born. Mrs Dombey is represented only like a wife who gives birth to a baby and after she is non-existent. Then, Mr Dombey daughter’s is considered as useless: indeed, we don’t know her name, she hasn’t got identity in her family and in our society. Her father neglects her because she couldn’t inherit of the family’s firm called “Dombey and son” because she is a girl. In this family, women don’t have a place.
But we also saw another document, which raises the issue of women during World War 2. Thanks to two texts about jobs of women during the war, we examined the entry of women in the workplace. Compared with the previous extract, these texts show an improvement in a positive way for women, it was a progress during this period. In fact, women had places of work! We learnt that they began to work in factories because they replaced men who were called to the war, they worked too on the land on farms and there was a public-awareness campaign to encourage women to join the land Army called “Women’s land army”. Then, some women enlisted in the army like nurses for example.
And after the war, we studied a short video called “Secrets of Success in the Workplace for women!” in order to emphasize what women are supposed to did in the workplace during the 1960’s. This video puts on stage Peggy Olson, the main-character who starts her first day at her job. She needs to learn the “basic rules” at work like how she should dress for success, make up her face, pay attention to her boss and be careful about her physical appearance. The idea of progress is the place of women in the workplace but this short video gives an image of women superficial, weak and whose only goal is to seduce men and get married for to have a better place in the family than in the workplace.
In a nutshell, we can say that the situation of women has improved even if they aren’t still respected, and the equality between men and women has not been totally achieved.
In my opinion, it’s already a great progress that women have a place in the workplace among men but through the century in our society we always keep an image of women who embody silliness or naivety, or of housewifes.
What is the place of woman in the workplace today?



Réponse: Oral/ idea of progress de here4u, postée le 24-03-2016 à 19:21:11 (S | E)
hello !

a few more ...
ce qui est souligné est maladroit, souvent calqué sur le français et ne se dirait pas ... XXX = éléments manquants.

Let’s talk about the idea of progress. The progress can be defined as the belief that something can evolve in a positive way or can improve. It can be a technical progress, scientific or social advance which contributes to make the world a better place. But progress isn’t always good, it can be negative progress.
In class, we studied this notion through the chapter: the place of women in society.
How has the place of women changed through the centurypluriel nécessaire!)?
To begin, we’re going to see if women found their place in our society during the Victorian period, especially within the family.
Then, let’s study the position of women during the world war II, more precisely in the workplace.
Finally, we will focus on the place of women in the workplace too but during= clumsy the 1960’s.
First, we studied an extract of a novel whose title is Dombey and Son and which illustrates the place of women in XXX family in 1848. The author is Charles Dickens. The idea of progress isn’t a positive evolution in this text, but on the contrary it illustrates the negligence of men opposite women in the family during the Victorian period. In this extract there are 4 characters who are Mr Dombey, his wife, their daughter who is 6 and their little son who has just been born= a baby son!. Mrs Dombey is represented only like a wife who gives birth to a baby and after she is non-existent. Then, Mr Dombey daughter’s is considered as useless: indeed, we don’t know her name, she hasn’t got XX identity in her family and in our society. Her father neglects her because she couldn’t inherit of the family’s firm called “Dombey and son” because she is a girl. In this family, women don’t have a place.
But we also saw another document, which raises (concordance des temps?) the issue of women during World War 2. Thanks to two texts about XXX jobs of women during the war, we examined the entry of women in the workplace. Compared with the previous extract, these texts show an improvement in a positive way for women, it was a progress during this period. In fact, women had places of work! We learnt that they began to work in factories because they replaced men who were called to the war, they worked too(ml placé!) on the land on farms and there was a public-awareness campaign to encourage women to join the land Army called “Women’s land army”. Then, some women enlisted in the army like= en tant que ... nurses for example.
And after the war, we studied a short video called “Secrets of Success in the Workplace for women!” in order to emphasize what women are supposed to did in the workplace during the 1960’s. This video puts on stage Peggy Olson(very clumsy! word order + voc...), the main-character who starts her first day at her job. She needs to learn the “basic rules” at work like how she should dress for success, make up her face, pay attention to her boss and be careful about her physical appearance. The idea of progress is the place of women in the workplace but this short video gives an image of women superficial,(cet adjectif est mal placé!) weak and whose only goal is to seduce men and get married for to= construction ! (ARGH ...)have a better place in the family than in the workplace.
In a nutshell, we can say that the situation of women has improved even if they aren’t still respected, and the equality between men and women has not been totally achieved.
In my opinion, it’s already a great progress that women have a place in the workplace among men ( a very clumsy construction!) but through the century in our society we always keep an image of women who??? (= image or women=> changer de construction!) embody silliness or naivety, or of housewifes.
What is the place of woman in the workplace today?

Etrange idée que de terminer sur une question non élucidée ...



Réponse: Oral/ idea of progress de charlene29, postée le 09-04-2016 à 16:27:26 (S | E)
Bonjour here4u, merci pour votre aide, j'ai suivi vos conseils et corrigé mes erreurs!

voila :



Let’s talk about the idea of progress. Progress can be defined as the belief that something can evolve in a positive way or can improve. It can be a technical progress, scientific or social advance which contributes to make the world a better place. But progress isn’t always good, it can be negative progress.
In class, we studied this notion through the chapter: the place of women in society.
How has the place of women changed through the centuries?
To begin, we’re going to see if women found their place in our society during the Victorian period, especially within the family.
Then, let’s study the position of women during world war II, more precisely in the workplace.
Finally, we will focus on the place of women in the workplace too but on the 1960’s.
First, we studied an extract of a novel whose title is Dombey and Son and which illustrates the place of women in the family in 1848. The author is Charles Dickens. The idea of progress isn’t a positive evolution in this text, but on the contrary it illustrates the negligence of men opposite women in the family during the Victorian period. In this extract there are 4 characters who are Mr Dombey, his wife, their daughter who is 6 and their baby son. Mrs Dombey is represented only like a wife who gives birth to a baby and then she is non-existent. Then, Mr Dombey daughter’s is considered as useless: indeed, we don’t know her name, she hasn’t got an identity in her family and in our society. Her father neglects her because she couldn’t inherit of the family’s firm called “Dombey and son” because she is a girl. In this family, women don’t have a place.
But we also saw another document, which raises the issue of women during World War 2. Thanks to two texts about the jobs of women during the war, we examined the entry of women in the workplace. Compared with the previous extract, these texts show an improvement in a positive way for women, it was a progress during this period. In fact, women could work! We learnt that they began to work in factories because they replaced men who had called to the war, then they worked on the land on farms and there was a public-awareness campaign to encourage women to join the land Army called “Women’s land army”. Then, some women enlisted in the army as nurses for example.
And after the war, we studied a short video called “Secrets of Success in the Workplace for women!” in order to emphasize what women are supposed to do in the workplace during the 1960’s. In this video, Peggy Olson, the main-character starts her first day at her job. She needs to learn the “basic rules” at work such how she should dress for success, make up her face, pay attention to her boss and be careful to her physical appearance. The idea of progress is the place of women in the workplace but this short video gives an image of superficial women, weak and whose only goal is to seduce men and get married in order to have a better place in the family than in the workplace.
In a nutshell, we can say that the situation of women has improved even if they aren’t always respected, and the equality between men and women has not been totally achieved.
In my opinion, women could work, certainly, but through the centuries in our society we still keep an image of women silly or naive, or of housewifes.
What are the women progress in the world?




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