Big Brother 2/Correction
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Message de kaleid posté le 14-05-2015 à 22:36:54 (S | E | F)
Bonjour!
Je souhaiterais que quelqu'un me corrige mon texte d'entraînement s'il vous plaît!
Je remercie d'avance ceux ou celles qui prendront le temps de m'aider!
When I see this Big Brother poster, what comes to my mind is first a TV show in which a group of people live together in a large house. They were isolated from the outside world but constantly watched by television cameras. The second thing that comes to my mind is George Orwell's novel, Nineteen Eight-Four . Moreover, Big Brother is a central character who always spies on the inhabitants of a dictatorship, he led. Although, it was almost invisible, it appears on the posters " Big Brother is watching". The chaaracter had become a metaphor of constant surveillance. And the low-angle shot give the feeling that the viewer are smaller. But what strikes and the viewer is the use of colours, since the predominant colours black against a yellow and red backgroung. Also what I find noteworth is the billboard in the bottom left hand corner. Above the writtings, we can see a huge eye that seems to be watchig the viewers. We can also read "obeay", that is in the imperative tense. As a result, people are compeled to obeay the orders of Big Brother.
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Modifié par lucile83 le 14-05-2015 22:41
Message de kaleid posté le 14-05-2015 à 22:36:54 (S | E | F)
Bonjour!
Je souhaiterais que quelqu'un me corrige mon texte d'entraînement s'il vous plaît!
Je remercie d'avance ceux ou celles qui prendront le temps de m'aider!
When I see this Big Brother poster, what comes to my mind is first a TV show in which a group of people live together in a large house. They were isolated from the outside world but constantly watched by television cameras. The second thing that comes to my mind is George Orwell's novel, Nineteen Eight-Four . Moreover, Big Brother is a central character who always spies on the inhabitants of a dictatorship, he led. Although, it was almost invisible, it appears on the posters " Big Brother is watching". The chaaracter had become a metaphor of constant surveillance. And the low-angle shot give the feeling that the viewer are smaller. But what strikes and the viewer is the use of colours, since the predominant colours black against a yellow and red backgroung. Also what I find noteworth is the billboard in the bottom left hand corner. Above the writtings, we can see a huge eye that seems to be watchig the viewers. We can also read "obeay", that is in the imperative tense. As a result, people are compeled to obeay the orders of Big Brother.
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Modifié par lucile83 le 14-05-2015 22:41
Réponse: Big Brother 2/Correction de violet91, postée le 17-05-2015 à 12:27:45 (S | E)
Bonjour Kaleid,
Vous maîtrisez la technique .( directionnelle en particulier ) ..mais il faut tout relire de près : de nombreuses fautes de frappe, orthographe( redoublement de consonne finale ) ou d'étourderie . Visiblement , vous connaissez le present simple et son danger à la 3ème sg : épluchez bien votre texte ...vous l'avez parfois oublié .
Je ne crois pas opportun de parler d'Orwell en 2ème position . Qui dit 'Big Brother is watching you ' dit '1984 ' et ...la connotation politique .
N'oubliez pas de caser '1er plan / arrièré -plan / milieu ...et le message que porte l'image ( to convey ) .
Pour finir l'impression personnelle qu'elle déclenche sur le spectateur ( vous et nous tous ) .
Have a lovely sunny Sunday !
Réponse: Big Brother 2/Correction de kaleid, postée le 18-05-2015 à 13:10:59 (S | E)
D'accord, je suivrais les conseils que vous m'avez donné. Sinon, je ne sais quoi dire si ce ,'est un énorme merci pour aide !
Sur ce je vous souhaite une bonne journée!
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