Idea of progress/Oral
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Message de liberia17 posté le 10-05-2015 à 18:48:35 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
j'ai mon oral d'anglais dans une semaine; pourriez-vous m'aider à corriger mon texte s'il vous plait?
Merci d'avance (je ne suis pas très à l'aise en anglais).
I’m going to talk about « Idea of progress ». To begin with, I’d like to state a definition of progress. Progress is the idea that the world and the society can evolve positively in therms of sciences, technology, modernization, living condition, etc. However there are two types of people on earth , those who finds the progress necessary for the evolution and those for whom the progress damaged the man. Now, I propose we look at a question : « The progress is necessary for the evolution? »
I. The progress allows for example of better way of living, better education, the equality or still in medicine . For example who allows women of power to have children while she could not have no it. For example the text B of design your baby explain the implantation genetic diagnosis.
II. But progress cab be dangerous if not controlled or used for bad. In the film « Welcome to Gattaca », science and technology have led to a world without emotions, without values and whiteout freedom. Many debates arise about the progress of science as : « Should parents be able to choose their baby’s gender ? » from an article of the MailOnline. There may be some good reasons to accept, but an ethical problem arises and a larger question arises : Where are the limits of progress ? CONCLUSION To conclusion, I’d say progress is neither all good or all bad. Put into the hands of human beings, that knowledge can be used for medicine or great advances. It’s not scientific knowledge that is either good or evil, but the application of it.
(je n'ai pas encore fini le I)
Merci
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Modifié par lucile83 le 14-05-2015 10:23
Message de liberia17 posté le 10-05-2015 à 18:48:35 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
j'ai mon oral d'anglais dans une semaine; pourriez-vous m'aider à corriger mon texte s'il vous plait?
Merci d'avance (je ne suis pas très à l'aise en anglais).
I’m going to talk about « Idea of progress ». To begin with, I’d like to state a definition of progress. Progress is the idea that the world and the society can evolve positively in therms of sciences, technology, modernization, living condition, etc. However there are two types of people on earth , those who finds the progress necessary for the evolution and those for whom the progress damaged the man. Now, I propose we look at a question : « The progress is necessary for the evolution? »
I. The progress allows for example of better way of living, better education, the equality or still in medicine . For example who allows women of power to have children while she could not have no it. For example the text B of design your baby explain the implantation genetic diagnosis.
II. But progress cab be dangerous if not controlled or used for bad. In the film « Welcome to Gattaca », science and technology have led to a world without emotions, without values and whiteout freedom. Many debates arise about the progress of science as : « Should parents be able to choose their baby’s gender ? » from an article of the MailOnline. There may be some good reasons to accept, but an ethical problem arises and a larger question arises : Where are the limits of progress ? CONCLUSION To conclusion, I’d say progress is neither all good or all bad. Put into the hands of human beings, that knowledge can be used for medicine or great advances. It’s not scientific knowledge that is either good or evil, but the application of it.
(je n'ai pas encore fini le I)
Merci
-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 14-05-2015 10:23
Réponse: Idea of progress/Oral de laure95, postée le 13-05-2015 à 13:45:58 (S | E)
- therms: corriger l'orthographe
- sciences : pas au pluriel.
- those who finds: problème de conjugaison
-the progress damaged: mettre au present perfect.
- I propose we look at a question : « The progress is necessary for the evolution? » : TO look + pas la structure d'une question: une question ne commence pas par le sujet.
I. The progress allows for example of better way of living: pourquoi OF?
- For example who allows women of power to have children while she could not have no it: tu ne peux pas commencer une phrase par WHO si ce n'est pas uner question+ OF power est mal dit + she could not have no it: ce n'est pas anglais.
For example the text B of design your baby explain the implantation genetic diagnosis : problème de conjugaison + pourquoi encore OF?
II.for bad: ?
- emotions: à mettre au singulier
CONCLUSION To conclusion: TO CONCLUDE
I’d say progress is neither all good or all bad: NOR et non OR
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Modifié par lucile83 le 14-05-2015 10:29
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