Correction oral /Bac
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Message de amad posté le 11-02-2015 à 16:07:42 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
je passe mon un oral blanc d'anglais le mardi 24 février.
Si possible, j'aimerais bien que l'on corrige mes fautes.
Merci d'avance!
" I'm going to talk about the notion spaces and exchanges.
First of all I would like to give a definition oh this notion(...).
To illustrate the notion, I have chose 2 documents we studied in classe. The first of one is a text, it's entitled "Postcard from the edge". It deals with a girl, Jenifer Davies who spent some time in a really small isolated and wild village in the Canadian Artic circle whose name Alklavic. She goes after her studies. In Alklavic she taught in a school, and she offered private lessons. It focuse on one aspect of the ntion because she leave the school to discover a new life, take a gap year when she will the minimum for example all community there are 1 grocery store, the children don't know read and write because many are affected by foetal alcohol syndrome because the mother drink a lot.
Now let me tell you about a second document in connection with our notion. It's entitled 'the moon in the Banyan Tree" , and it's an autobiographical novels published in 2005. It deals with Gael Harrison, a woman who is a teacher. She has children and she is divorced. She is probably in her fourties as. She decided to apply as volunter with VSO.Voluntary Service Overseas is an international development agency that works through volunteers. We promote volunteering to fight global poverty, by supporting peapole to share skills, creativity and learnin with communities around the world. She go to Vietnam in February 2001. It focuse on one aspect of the notion because the people, the food, the clothes are different. She has very impressed by all that, it reveals that she has very impressed for this county? She is victim of a culture shock.
Now, let me explain the reason why I have chosen yhese documents. It's because both of them are testimonies of people and explain why making that choice, their feeling. Also these woman gave me desire to go to abroad because going in countries disadvantaged to bring our knowledge looks really great.
To my mind, the document that best illustrates the notion is the moon in the Banyan tree beause to show an any situation is possible take a year off.
I'd like to end ba saying that really enjoyed studying this notion and I really feel like taking a year off and change my routines. I aldo want to add that to I've already travelled to Spain and in Tunisia, I've discover other culture and a welcoming coutry especialy Tunisia. It's been a grat experience.I'll tra Later if I can I'll travel a lot
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Modifié par lucile83 le 11-02-2015 17:57
Message de amad posté le 11-02-2015 à 16:07:42 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
je passe mon un oral blanc d'anglais le mardi 24 février.
Si possible, j'aimerais bien que l'on corrige mes fautes.
Merci d'avance!
" I'm going to talk about the notion spaces and exchanges.
First of all I would like to give a definition oh this notion(...).
To illustrate the notion, I have chose 2 documents we studied in classe. The first of one is a text, it's entitled "Postcard from the edge". It deals with a girl, Jenifer Davies who spent some time in a really small isolated and wild village in the Canadian Artic circle whose name Alklavic. She goes after her studies. In Alklavic she taught in a school, and she offered private lessons. It focuse on one aspect of the ntion because she leave the school to discover a new life, take a gap year when she will the minimum for example all community there are 1 grocery store, the children don't know read and write because many are affected by foetal alcohol syndrome because the mother drink a lot.
Now let me tell you about a second document in connection with our notion. It's entitled 'the moon in the Banyan Tree" , and it's an autobiographical novels published in 2005. It deals with Gael Harrison, a woman who is a teacher. She has children and she is divorced. She is probably in her fourties as. She decided to apply as volunter with VSO.Voluntary Service Overseas is an international development agency that works through volunteers. We promote volunteering to fight global poverty, by supporting peapole to share skills, creativity and learnin with communities around the world. She go to Vietnam in February 2001. It focuse on one aspect of the notion because the people, the food, the clothes are different. She has very impressed by all that, it reveals that she has very impressed for this county? She is victim of a culture shock.
Now, let me explain the reason why I have chosen yhese documents. It's because both of them are testimonies of people and explain why making that choice, their feeling. Also these woman gave me desire to go to abroad because going in countries disadvantaged to bring our knowledge looks really great.
To my mind, the document that best illustrates the notion is the moon in the Banyan tree beause to show an any situation is possible take a year off.
I'd like to end ba saying that really enjoyed studying this notion and I really feel like taking a year off and change my routines. I aldo want to add that to I've already travelled to Spain and in Tunisia, I've discover other culture and a welcoming coutry especialy Tunisia. It's been a grat experience.I'll tra Later if I can I'll travel a lot
-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 11-02-2015 17:57
Réponse: Correction oral /Bac de here4u, postée le 11-02-2015 à 23:22:16 (S | E)
Hello !
blue = wrong
xxxxxx= clumsy
XXXX missing elements
Green = suggestions.
" I'm going to talk about the notion XX spaces and exchanges.
First of all I would like to give a definition oh this notion(...).(there are two, aren't there? )
To illustrate the notion, I have chose 2 documents we studied in classe. The first
Now let me tell you about a second document in connection with our notion. It's entitled 'the moon in the Banyan Tree" , and it's an autobiographical novels published in 2005. It deals with Gael Harrison, a woman who is a teacher. She has children and she is divorced. She is probably in her fourties as. She decided to apply as X volunter with VSO.Voluntary Service Overseas is an international development agency that works through?? volunteers. We promote volunteering to fight global poverty, by supporting peapole to share skills, creativity and learninG with communities around the world. She go to Vietnam in February 2001. It focuse on one aspect of the notion because the people, the food, the clothes are different. She has very impressed by all that, it reveals (tense?)that she has very impressed for this county? She is X victim of a culture shock.
Now, let me explain the reason why I have chosen yhese documents. It's because both of them are testimonies of people and explain why making that choice, their feeling. Also these woman gave me desire to go to abroad because going inXX countries disadvantaged to bring our knowledge looks really great.
To my mind, the document that best illustrates the notion is the moon in the Banyan tree beause to show an any situation is possible take a year off.(sorry ...!It doesn't make sense ...)
I'd like to end ba saying that X really enjoyed studying this notion and I really feel like taking a year off and change my routines. I aldo want to add that to I've already travelled to Spain and in Tunisia, I've discover other culture and a welcoming coutry especialy Tunisia. It's been a grat experience.I'll tra??? Later if I can I'll travel a lot
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