Biography/correction
Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En basBiography/correction
Message de laura1215 posté le 31-01-2013 à 13:17:19 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
je suis en 3ème et je dois réaliser une biographie en anglais sur Amy Winehouse. Je ne suis pas très douée et je me demandais si vous pourriez m'aider et me dire si j'ai fait des fautes s'il vous plaît ?
Merci beaucoup.
She was born in 14 september 1983 in Londres. Her family loved theater and music. Amy was brought up on jazz music; she played her brother's guitar and received her own guitar at 13 years. At 18 years she gave her firts concert and in 1999 she signes a contract with Island Records. Her first album was "Frank", it has been successful! In 2006 she wrote "Black to black" because her boyfriend, Blake Fielder-Civil, leaves her. She began to drink alcohol! In september 2006, they wanted to put her in a rehab and this is why she wrote "Rehab" in 2006. Finally in 2008 she went to rehab and her husband went to prison. She divorced in 2009. Amy has a breakdown after that.. She died in 23 july 2011 because of her alcohol problems.
-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 31-01-2013 16:31
Message de laura1215 posté le 31-01-2013 à 13:17:19 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
je suis en 3ème et je dois réaliser une biographie en anglais sur Amy Winehouse. Je ne suis pas très douée et je me demandais si vous pourriez m'aider et me dire si j'ai fait des fautes s'il vous plaît ?
Merci beaucoup.
She was born in 14 september 1983 in Londres. Her family loved theater and music. Amy was brought up on jazz music; she played her brother's guitar and received her own guitar at 13 years. At 18 years she gave her firts concert and in 1999 she signes a contract with Island Records. Her first album was "Frank", it has been successful! In 2006 she wrote "Black to black" because her boyfriend, Blake Fielder-Civil, leaves her. She began to drink alcohol! In september 2006, they wanted to put her in a rehab and this is why she wrote "Rehab" in 2006. Finally in 2008 she went to rehab and her husband went to prison. She divorced in 2009. Amy has a breakdown after that.. She died in 23 july 2011 because of her alcohol problems.
-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 31-01-2013 16:31
Réponse: Biography/correction de brettdallen, postée le 31-01-2013 à 13:28:57 (S | E)
Bonjour,
Quelques propositions de correction ou d'amélioration.
She was born in (autre préposition) 14 september 1983 in Londres (en anglais, Londres = ...). Her family loved theater (ce n'est pas le bon mot) and music. Amy was brought up on ? jazz music; she played her brother's guitar and received her own guitar at 13 years (mot à mot : à l'âge de 13 ans). At 18
Cordialement.
Réponse: Biography/correction de sherry48, postée le 31-01-2013 à 13:31:55 (S | E)
Hello.
She was born in
14 september 1983 in Londres. (English?) Her family loved theater and music. Amy was brought up on jazz music; she played her brother's guitar and received her own guitar at 13 years. At the age of 13 / when she was 13...At 18 years
she gave her firts concert and in 1999 she signes a contract with Island Records. Her first album was "Frank", (Use 2 sentences or a semicolon) it has been successful! In 2006 she wrote "Black to black" because her boyfriend, Blake Fielder-Civil, leaves (not present tense) her. She began to drink alcohol! In september 2006, they wanted to put her in a rehab and that is why she wrote "Rehab" in 2006. Finally, in 2008, she went to rehab and her husband went to prison. She divorced/was divorced in 2009. Amy has (not present tense) a breakdown after that.. She died in 23 july 2011 because of her alcohol problems. It would be helpful to review prepositions.
Sherry
Réponse: Biography/correction de laura1215, postée le 31-01-2013 à 13:42:11 (S | E)
Merci beaucoup à vous deux pour m'avoir aidée!
Est-ce mieux comme ceci ?
She was born on 14 september 1983 in London. Her family loved theater and music. Amy was brought up on jazz music; she played her brother's guitar and received her own guitar when she was 13. At 18 she gave her firts concert and in 1999 she signed a contract with Island Records. Her firts album was "Frank" it had been successful! In 2006 she wrote "Black to black" because her boyfriend, Blake Fielder-Civil, left her. She began to drink alcohol! In september 2006, they wanted to put her in a rehab and this is why she wrote "Rehab" in 2006. Finally in 2008 she went to rehab and her husband went to prison. She divorced in 2009. Amy had a breakdown after that.. She died on 23 july 2011 because of her alcohol problems.
-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 31-01-2013 16:33
Réponse: Biography/correction de bluestar, postée le 31-01-2013 à 17:52:14 (S | E)
Bonjour...
Vous n'avez pas corrigé toutes les erreurs déjà indiquées...
She was born on 14 sSeptember 1983 in London. Her family loved theater
and music. Amy was brought up on jazz music; she played her brother's guitar and received her own guitar when she was 13. At 18 she gave her firts (orth.) concert and in 1999 she signed a contract with Island Records. Her firts (orth.) album was "Frank" and it had been (temps) successful! In 2006 she wrote "Black to Bblack" because her boyfriend, Blake Fielder-Civil, left her. She began to drink alcohol! In Sseptember 2006, they wanted to put her in a rehab and this is why she wrote "Rehab" in 2006. Finally in 2008 she went to rehab and her husband went to prison. She divorced in 2009. Amy had a breakdown after that.. She died on 23 Jjuly 2011 because of her alcohol problems. La chanson s'appelle "Back to Black" et non "Black to Black".
En anglais les mois de l'année commencent toujours par une majuscule - de même que tous les noms propres.
Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais
