Correction/Driving test
Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En basCorrection/Driving test
Message de looserinenglish posté le 29-01-2013 à 17:46:44 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
Je dois faire le résumé et le commentaire d'un article de journal pour le lycée. Seulement, je fais beaucoup de fautes et j'ai beaucoup de mauvaises notes. Voici mon dernier commentaire et j'aimerais que quelqu'un corrige mes fautes en m'expliquant afin que je puisse les comprendre et progressersvp s'il vous plaît. Je sais, c'est long, et je vous en demande un peu trop mais ce serait tellement gentil...
Merci d'avance en tout cas
Driving test to go green with eco-questions
The unceasing population increase gives rise to a rise of the trafic jam. Consequently we face to an important pollution. It's a real problem because this pollution have a harmful impact on health and on the environment and few people realize it. So, how could we raise people's awareness of this problem ?
According this article from The Sunday Times, in Britain, driving test candidates are now confronted to an eco-friendly test in theory part of the test. Indeed, drivers have to answer at a series of « green » questions and this for two reasons. The first reason is for raising people's awareness of the problem in order to make people think about it. The second reason is for bringing solutions and cleverness so as to encourage people to reduce their gas consumption and conduct them to use others mode of transport like bikes or the railway. This proposition is contained in a consultation document published by the Driving Standards Agency. The agency wants to go further increasing the number of the questions in the theory test but also she intends to include practical eco-question. The agency's proposition is encouraged by the government. Ministers are keen to find new ways of reducting pollution. He wants take measures in order to support the agency's idea.
According to me, this project is a good idea. But I think it's not enough if we want to narrow this environmental issue. Everybody knows to take bike is better for the environment than car, or also that using air conditionning is worse than opening his window. Even if it's necessary to remind goods customs that we have to have, it's a whole society which must change.
First, it's necessary to encourage ecological project such as carpooling, especially between companies' employees. Also, governments may develop infrastructure for cyclist in order to they feel protect and encourage them to take their bikes. Indeed, in cities, with the trafic jam, it coul be worrying for people to take his bike. However, we have to be careful about bikes. A study reveals that an electric bike produced in China or in India pollute more than a car in France. Because electricity was produced with coal in power station which more contaminates than ours own power plants in Europe.
Secondly, it's necessary to reduce public transport prices in order to encourage people for taking them and not theirs car. For example, in Gironde, the companie « ReseauTrans Gironde » reduce her service price since september of 2013. Consequently, largely is there advantageous to take bus and not his car.
After, I think that we want reduce this pollution, we have to reconsider the globalization and and the Schengen area. We should prefer the import market than the foreign market. Indeed, avoiding to adress demand for goods at other coutries may contribute to reduce commercial transports by planes, boats or lorries that are more harmful than cars. But, today, I know that is impossible because every countries is already interrelated. Also, I think that governments have to grant-aid the search so as develop green powers and continue to develop electrics cars.
To conclude, I think that it's necessary to reduce pollution but, even if the Drivig Standards Agency's proposition is a good idea which must be applicated, it isn't enough because the whole world have to change and do efforts. Only, some countries is not ready to change when we see Tokyo protocole's result.
-------------------
Modifié par looserinenglish le 29-01-2013 18:33
-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 29-01-2013 22:37
Message de looserinenglish posté le 29-01-2013 à 17:46:44 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
Je dois faire le résumé et le commentaire d'un article de journal pour le lycée. Seulement, je fais beaucoup de fautes et j'ai beaucoup de mauvaises notes. Voici mon dernier commentaire et j'aimerais que quelqu'un corrige mes fautes en m'expliquant afin que je puisse les comprendre et progresser
Merci d'avance en tout cas
Driving test to go green with eco-questions
The unceasing population increase gives rise to a rise of the trafic jam. Consequently we face to an important pollution. It's a real problem because this pollution have a harmful impact on health and on the environment and few people realize it. So, how could we raise people's awareness of this problem ?
According this article from The Sunday Times, in Britain, driving test candidates are now confronted to an eco-friendly test in theory part of the test. Indeed, drivers have to answer at a series of « green » questions and this for two reasons. The first reason is for raising people's awareness of the problem in order to make people think about it. The second reason is for bringing solutions and cleverness so as to encourage people to reduce their gas consumption and conduct them to use others mode of transport like bikes or the railway. This proposition is contained in a consultation document published by the Driving Standards Agency. The agency wants to go further increasing the number of the questions in the theory test but also she intends to include practical eco-question. The agency's proposition is encouraged by the government. Ministers are keen to find new ways of reducting pollution. He wants take measures in order to support the agency's idea.
According to me, this project is a good idea. But I think it's not enough if we want to narrow this environmental issue. Everybody knows to take bike is better for the environment than car, or also that using air conditionning is worse than opening his window. Even if it's necessary to remind goods customs that we have to have, it's a whole society which must change.
First, it's necessary to encourage ecological project such as carpooling, especially between companies' employees. Also, governments may develop infrastructure for cyclist in order to they feel protect and encourage them to take their bikes. Indeed, in cities, with the trafic jam, it coul be worrying for people to take his bike. However, we have to be careful about bikes. A study reveals that an electric bike produced in China or in India pollute more than a car in France. Because electricity was produced with coal in power station which more contaminates than ours own power plants in Europe.
Secondly, it's necessary to reduce public transport prices in order to encourage people for taking them and not theirs car. For example, in Gironde, the companie « ReseauTrans Gironde » reduce her service price since september of 2013. Consequently, largely is there advantageous to take bus and not his car.
After, I think that we want reduce this pollution, we have to reconsider the globalization and and the Schengen area. We should prefer the import market than the foreign market. Indeed, avoiding to adress demand for goods at other coutries may contribute to reduce commercial transports by planes, boats or lorries that are more harmful than cars. But, today, I know that is impossible because every countries is already interrelated. Also, I think that governments have to grant-aid the search so as develop green powers and continue to develop electrics cars.
To conclude, I think that it's necessary to reduce pollution but, even if the Drivig Standards Agency's proposition is a good idea which must be applicated, it isn't enough because the whole world have to change and do efforts. Only, some countries is not ready to change when we see Tokyo protocole's result.
-------------------
Modifié par looserinenglish le 29-01-2013 18:33
-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 29-01-2013 22:37
Réponse: Correction/Driving test de lucile83, postée le 30-01-2013 à 14:01:17 (S | E)
Hello,
To start with...
The unceasing population increase gives rise to a rise...répétition à éviter of the trafic jam. Consequently we face to an important pollution. It's a real problem because this pollution have a harmful impact on health and on the environment and few people realize it. So, how could we raise people's awareness of this problem ?
According ... this article from The Sunday Times, in Britain, driving test candidates are now confronted to an eco-friendly test in theory part of the test. Indeed, drivers have to answer at a series of « green » questions and this for two reasons. The first reason is for raising infinitive would be better people's awareness of the problem in order to make people think about it. The second reason is for bringing infinitive would be better solutions and cleverness so as to encourage people to reduce their gas consumption and conduct them to use others mode of transport like...revoir chaque mot bikes or the railway. This proposition is contained in a consultation document published by the Driving Standards Agency. The agency wants to go further increasing the number of the questions in the theory test but also she intends to include practical eco-question plural?. The agency's proposition is encouraged by the government. Ministers are keen to find new ways of reducting pollution. He wants ... take measures in order to support the agency's idea.
Réponse: Correction/Driving test de bluestar, postée le 30-01-2013 à 14:43:24 (S | E)
Bonjour...à continuer là où Lucile a cessé ...
According to me, I believe this project is a good idea. But I think it's not enough if we want to narrow this environmental issue. Everybody knows to take using a bike is better for the environment than a car,and or also that using air conditionning is worse than opening his a window. Even if it's necessary to remind (qui?) of the goods customs that we have to have, it's a whole society which must change.
First, it's necessary to encourage ecological project(pluriel) such as carpooling, especially between companies' employees. Also, governments may develop infrastructure for cyclist(pluriel) in order to that they feel protect (il faut participe passe -ed) and encourage them to take their bikes. Indeed, in cities, with the traffic jam,(pluriel) it could be worrying for people to take his (acccorde) bike (pluriel). However, we have to be careful about bikes. A study reveals that an electric bike produced in China or in India pollute (accorde) more than a car in France. (continuer la même phrase)bBecause electricity was(temps) produced with coal in power station(pluriel) which more contaminates (order des mots)than ours own power plants in Europe.
Secondly, it's necessary to reduce public transport prices in order to encourage people for taking them(infinitif..to t---) and not theirs car(pluriel). For example, in Gironde, the companie (orth.?) « ReseauTrans Gironde » reduce (temps) her
service price since september(majuscule) of 2013. Consequently, largely it is there advantageous to take bus and not his the car.After, I think that if we want reduce this pollution, we have to reconsider the globalization and and the Schengen area. We should prefer the import market than to the foreign market. Indeed, avoiding to address (verbe -ing)demand for goods at in other coutries(orth.) may contribute to reduce (verbe -ing) commercial transports by planes, boats or lorries that are more harmful than cars. But, today, I know that is impossible because every all countries is are already interrelated. Also, I think that governments have to grant-aid the search so as develop green powers and continue to develop electrics cars.
To conclude, I think that it's necessary to reduce pollution but, even if the Driving Standards Agency's proposition is a good idea which must be applicated
, it isn't enough because the whole world have (accorde) to change and do make efforts. Only, some countries is (accorde) not ready to change when we see Tokyo protocole's result.-------------------
Modifié par bluestar le 30-01-2013 14:52
Réponse: Correction/Driving test de joebrodie, postée le 30-01-2013 à 15:32:27 (S | E)
Bonjour!
Une idée: peut-être faire des phrases moins longues?
(Exemple: The number of cars increases with the population, and the pollution generated is also on the rise.)
Attention:
to face a problem (rien entre)
according TO
the reason is to + verbe (to make people aware that they can reduce their gas consumption/that their driving can impact the environment)
It's necessary to remind us of the appropriate behaviour/way of driving in order to reduce our impact on the environment, but the change has to take place on a more global level (si j'ai bien compris).
Ministers...THEY want to take measures...
Bike lanes (ou paths)= pistes cyclables
There should more bike lanes, because they ensure safety for cyclists (but also pedestrians).
"if we want to narrow..." if we want to address this...(saisir ce pb), réduire le pb c'est if we want to reduce our negative impact.
public transportation fares
in order to encourage people to take them instead of their cars
for example in the French Departement of the Gironde, the fares on public transportation services have been lowered since September. Cheaper fares on public transport can be an incentive (une motivation) to leave the car in the garage. (si c'est bien ça).
Votre phrase devrait donner "it makes it more advantageous to take them than the car).
Je n'ai pas bien compris le passage sur le commerce international, voulez-vous dire: "global exchanges mean shipping goods by boats or planes that are way more polluting than modern cars (si vous en êtes sûre). We should buy locally produced goods as much as possible."
(pourquoi dire que c'est impossible alors?)
Courage, essayer de moins faire de mot à mot, c'est ça qui vous mène à des phrases longues mais pas toujours très claires.
Cheers
JB
Réponse: Correction/Driving test de looserinenglish, postée le 01-02-2013 à 10:09:42 (S | E)
Bonjour,
Tout d'abord un grand MERCI pour vos réponses!
Alors oui c'est mon problème les phrases longues, problème que j'aimerais régler mais jen'arrive jamais à dire les choses simplement... !donc à travailler!
Pour JB, je voulais dire que la mondialisation entraînait une hausse des transports de marchandises et même des humains d'un pays vers un autre, et donc de l'utilisation des avions, bateau (porte-conteneurs)et camions qui au final polluent bien plus que les voitures. Mais que c'est presque impossible aujourd'hui de mettre fin à ça puisque chaque pays est indépendant d'un autre suite à une forte spécialisation de chacun d'eux et également par le fait que certains pays ne ne s'autosuffisent pas à eux même.
-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 01-02-2013 12:33
Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais
