Fautes / Boxing
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Message de klairou posté le 24-11-2012 à 18:13:49 (S | E | F)
Bonsoir !
J'ai écrit un texte en anglais et je voudrais savoir si j'ai fait des erreurs d'orthographe, de temps ou de grammaire, et de me les expliquer si c'est possible!!
This vocable article is about female boxing in India. This sport is disapproved in India, whereas Indian women won a third place at the last world championships.
This article shows India as a sexist country, because female boxing is disapproved by the society and the Indian government doesn’t actually support them. For example, the ways of training are better in China, which is one of the big competitor of India for boxing.
But female boxing is a symbol of freedom, as it is said in the text : “they bowed their heads to the floor, as though entering a temple”. This sport is a way for women to assert themselves, to be ambitious. It allows them to go out in the streets without fear, for example.
It is also a chance for them to get a middle-class life, because the government rewards professional athletes with government employment. For example, the best woman Indian boxer Kom has a job in the police department, a bungalow paid by the government and lucratives honors.
I think education of women and the media coverage of female boxing in India can change misconceived ideas about women. Moreover, the upward mobility in the mainstream society provided by the government for professional athletes shows that there is a hope in the advancement of women in India. In fact, advancement of women in India is considered to be one of the world’s toughest.
In a French context, It was not until 2003 that women's boxing acquire professional status. It took more than a century for women to join men in the boxing rings.I think, in the depths of culture and collective memory, sport is still opposing woman and man identity, even in France.
Voilà! merci beaucoup!
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Modifié par lucile83 le 24-11-2012 21:26
Message de klairou posté le 24-11-2012 à 18:13:49 (S | E | F)
Bonsoir !
J'ai écrit un texte en anglais et je voudrais savoir si j'ai fait des erreurs d'orthographe, de temps ou de grammaire, et de me les expliquer si c'est possible!!
This vocable article is about female boxing in India. This sport is disapproved in India, whereas Indian women won a third place at the last world championships.
This article shows India as a sexist country, because female boxing is disapproved by the society and the Indian government doesn’t actually support them. For example, the ways of training are better in China, which is one of the big competitor of India for boxing.
But female boxing is a symbol of freedom, as it is said in the text : “they bowed their heads to the floor, as though entering a temple”. This sport is a way for women to assert themselves, to be ambitious. It allows them to go out in the streets without fear, for example.
It is also a chance for them to get a middle-class life, because the government rewards professional athletes with government employment. For example, the best woman Indian boxer Kom has a job in the police department, a bungalow paid by the government and lucratives honors.
I think education of women and the media coverage of female boxing in India can change misconceived ideas about women. Moreover, the upward mobility in the mainstream society provided by the government for professional athletes shows that there is a hope in the advancement of women in India. In fact, advancement of women in India is considered to be one of the world’s toughest.
In a French context, It was not until 2003 that women's boxing acquire professional status. It took more than a century for women to join men in the boxing rings.I think, in the depths of culture and collective memory, sport is still opposing woman and man identity, even in France.
Voilà! merci beaucoup!
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Modifié par lucile83 le 24-11-2012 21:26
Réponse: Fautes / Boxing de sherry48, postée le 25-11-2012 à 00:23:32 (S | E)
Hello. You don't have many major errors, but I have pointed out a few things you can improve.
This vocable
article is about female boxing in India. This sport is disapproved in India, whereas Indian women won a third place at the last world championships. (I would start with Although Indian women won third place...) This article shows India as a sexist country, because female boxing is disapproved by (the) society and the Indian government doesn’t actually support them. For example, the ways of training are better in China, which is one of the big competitor_ of India for boxing.
But female boxing is a symbol of freedom, as it is said in the text : “they bowed their heads to the floor, as though entering a temple”. This sport is a way for women to assert themselves, to be ambitious. It allows them to go out in the streets without fear, for example.
It is also a chance for them to get a middle-class life, because the government rewards professional athletes with government employment. For example, the best woman Indian boxer Kom has a job in the police department, a bungalow paid __ by the government and lucratives honors.
I think education of women and (the) media coverage of female boxing in India can change misconceived ideas (use a noun form for 'misconceived' instead)about women. Moreover, (the) upward mobility in the mainstream society provided by the government for professional athletes shows that there is a hope __
In a French context, it was not until 2003 that women's boxing acquire_ professional status. It took more than a century for women to join men in the boxing rings.I think, in the depths of culture and collective memory, sport is still opposing woman and man identity, even in France. (I think you can state this more clearly).
Sherry
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Modifié par sherry48 le 25-11-2012 00:23
Réponse: Fautes / Boxing de klairou, postée le 28-11-2012 à 19:02:10 (S | E)
Thank you very much!!!
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