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Texte/Environnement
Message de mesrines posté le 11-12-2011 à 19:11:33 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
j'ai un oral d'anglais mercredi sur une cause environnementale alors j'ai préparé ce texte en anglais (j'ai choisi comme sujet l'eau).
Merci de corriger mes erreurs ou mes mauvaises tournures de phrases s'il vous plaît
Mais si vous trouvez ça long, essayez de m'aider à partir des conséquences ou ne faire qu'une seule partie 
PS: Je n'ai pas mis le début de mon exposé car je suis sûr de cette partie
-The chimicals from the plants are discharged into the sea
-Oil is the cause of the the oil spill
However, one of the greatest danger to the reserve of freshwater is urbanization. This problem grow, so we will must learn to regulate our water consumption. Morever, dams change the distribution of water ressources between coutries.
The consequences
The pollution of the seas has many consequences, like for exemple:
The rise of water will grow the natural disasters, for exemple, the effects of cyclones will be aggraved by the rise of water and so they may be more many and more violent. Other example, the floods will be more dangerous whereas in other regions more dry, they will have growing fire more difficult to control.
The desert expand like for example, in Niger, the desert wins 200 000 hectares by years.
Water is also contaminated. We jave long believed that the products thrown into nature were eliminated progressively. Unhappily, that doesn’t always happen: the pesticides will can land into oceans.
That way, the contamination of the water affects one of our most precious needs: drinking. As well, it’s the cause of the new diseqse, for exmple, cancers by the chemical pollution.
Act
There is a lot to do for heal and save the ocean, like for example:
modify and regulate the fishing industry
forbid industrial factory ships
forbid to hunt of the whales
stop to throw of polluants into the sea
The ocean covers over 70% of our planet, but only 2% are protected. Therefore, each person can also do something, for example: limite our waste, take showers instead of baths or else, save energy.
Conclusion
Our blue planet is very sick. Long since, the man dirty, poisons and destroys the sea. Today, for repair the damages and prevent repeating the mistakes, it’s urgent if we won’t will the sea die forever.
Merci de m'aider
-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 11-12-2011 21:32
+ politesse
Message de mesrines posté le 11-12-2011 à 19:11:33 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
j'ai un oral d'anglais mercredi sur une cause environnementale alors j'ai préparé ce texte en anglais (j'ai choisi comme sujet l'eau).
Merci de corriger mes erreurs ou mes mauvaises tournures de phrases s'il vous plaît
Mais si vous trouvez ça long, essayez de m'aider à partir des conséquences ou ne faire qu'une seule partie PS: Je n'ai pas mis le début de mon exposé car je suis sûr de cette partie
-The chimicals from the plants are discharged into the sea
-Oil is the cause of the the oil spill
However, one of the greatest danger to the reserve of freshwater is urbanization. This problem grow, so we will must learn to regulate our water consumption. Morever, dams change the distribution of water ressources between coutries.
The consequences
The pollution of the seas has many consequences, like for exemple:
The rise of water will grow the natural disasters, for exemple, the effects of cyclones will be aggraved by the rise of water and so they may be more many and more violent. Other example, the floods will be more dangerous whereas in other regions more dry, they will have growing fire more difficult to control.
The desert expand like for example, in Niger, the desert wins 200 000 hectares by years.
Water is also contaminated. We jave long believed that the products thrown into nature were eliminated progressively. Unhappily, that doesn’t always happen: the pesticides will can land into oceans.
That way, the contamination of the water affects one of our most precious needs: drinking. As well, it’s the cause of the new diseqse, for exmple, cancers by the chemical pollution.
Act
There is a lot to do for heal and save the ocean, like for example:
modify and regulate the fishing industry
forbid industrial factory ships
forbid to hunt of the whales
stop to throw of polluants into the sea
The ocean covers over 70% of our planet, but only 2% are protected. Therefore, each person can also do something, for example: limite our waste, take showers instead of baths or else, save energy.
Conclusion
Our blue planet is very sick. Long since, the man dirty, poisons and destroys the sea. Today, for repair the damages and prevent repeating the mistakes, it’s urgent if we won’t will the sea die forever.
Merci de m'aider
-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 11-12-2011 21:32
+ politesse
Réponse: Texte/Environnement de edesaint, postée le 13-12-2011 à 03:14:03 (S | E)
Quelques erreurs de conjugaison: this problem grows et non grow
-so we will must: on ne peut pas utiliser deux modaux à la fois
example et non exemple
Il faudrait employer un autre verbe dans la phrase: "The rise of qater will grow..."
A la troisième personne, le verbe prend "s" en anglais.
Voici un bon dictionnaire en ligne qui pourra vous aider: Lien internet
Réponse: Texte/Environnement de notrepere, postée le 13-12-2011 à 05:50:02 (S | E)
Bonjour-The chimicals from the plants are discharged into the sea
-Oil is the cause of the the oil (inutile, il est évident, non?) spill
However, one of the greatest danger (1) to the reserve of freshwater is urbanization. This problem grow (2), so we will (3) must learn to regulate our water consumption. Moreover, dams change the distribution of water ressources between countries.
(1) structure : one of the + nom au pluriel
(2) forme progressive
(3) inutile
The consequences
The pollution of the seas has many consequences, like for exemple (4):
(4) inutile d'employer les deux : like et for example. Il faut choisir l'un ou l'autre.
The rise of water will grow (5) the natural disasters, for exemple, the effects of cyclones will be aggraved (6) by the rise of water and so there may be more many (7) and more violent.
(5) ce verbe ne va pas
(6) orthographe
(7) ordre des mots
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