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IELTS practise exercises4
Message de elasista posté le 29-05-2011 à 01:44:15 (S | E | F)
Hello, this is my third essay. First, I want to thanks all of you who take time to proofread what I wrote. You really help me to improve.
Write about the fallowing topic.
For a long time,there has been concern about the quality of the food we eat because of additives and contaminants.Recently, genetically modified food has become more common, causing concern. Is this concern justified or not?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.Write at least 250 words.
Back to some years ago, people were not really concerned about the food they ate. When they went to the grocer’s or to the supermarket, they did not used to take time on looking what ingredients were in the products or where were the product made and how. Nowadays, the situation has improved; it has slightly changed because of the media or some lobby like “Test Achat” who requires to always indicate on the packaging, the components and other information about the product. Because, we have started to be more aware that some foods could make us or our baby become sick, people feel more and more concern about they eat often daily. Moreover with the media coverage, a lot of secret truths came up like the addition of some addictives or contaminants. Now it is the turn of genetically modified food which appears at the end of the twentieth-century to cause a lot of concern. I do understand that. First, we are all aware that everything around us as a component which can damage our lives or bring us disease and despite that, we can unfortunately not change anything. We cannot live any more without television or microwave. But we can still control what is on our dishes. Second, even though, many researches are done in order to show to consumers how healthy the genetically modified food can be, people are still worries. For some of them, it is like you took away from them their freedom of choosing what they want to eat. Now, if you want to eat healthy food, you have to pay a little more.
To sum up, I would say that the society want to control everything in our lives and sometimes can provide us unhealthy foods if they can make profits. If some group like test Achat did not exist to protect and to warn consumers, we would have already developed some new diseases.
Message de elasista posté le 29-05-2011 à 01:44:15 (S | E | F)
Hello, this is my third essay. First, I want to thanks all of you who take time to proofread what I wrote. You really help me to improve.
Write about the fallowing topic.
For a long time,there has been concern about the quality of the food we eat because of additives and contaminants.Recently, genetically modified food has become more common, causing concern. Is this concern justified or not?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.Write at least 250 words.
Back to some years ago, people were not really concerned about the food they ate. When they went to the grocer’s or to the supermarket, they did not used to take time on looking what ingredients were in the products or where were the product made and how. Nowadays, the situation has improved; it has slightly changed because of the media or some lobby like “Test Achat” who requires to always indicate on the packaging, the components and other information about the product. Because, we have started to be more aware that some foods could make us or our baby become sick, people feel more and more concern about they eat often daily. Moreover with the media coverage, a lot of secret truths came up like the addition of some addictives or contaminants. Now it is the turn of genetically modified food which appears at the end of the twentieth-century to cause a lot of concern. I do understand that. First, we are all aware that everything around us as a component which can damage our lives or bring us disease and despite that, we can unfortunately not change anything. We cannot live any more without television or microwave. But we can still control what is on our dishes. Second, even though, many researches are done in order to show to consumers how healthy the genetically modified food can be, people are still worries. For some of them, it is like you took away from them their freedom of choosing what they want to eat. Now, if you want to eat healthy food, you have to pay a little more.
To sum up, I would say that the society want to control everything in our lives and sometimes can provide us unhealthy foods if they can make profits. If some group like test Achat did not exist to protect and to warn consumers, we would have already developed some new diseases.
Réponse: IELTS practise exercises4 de dsmith, postée le 29-05-2011 à 04:13:23 (S | E)
Hello,
Here are some corrections:
Back to some years ago (Back and ago are redundant - don't use both), people were not really concerned about the food they ate. When they went to the grocer’s or to the supermarket, they did not used to take time to look at what ingredients were in the products or where the products (need to be consistent with the other products) were made and how. Nowadays, the situation has improved; it has slightly changed because of the media or some lobby like “Test Achat” who requires that the components and other information about the product are always indicate on the packaging (this is a better order). Because, we have started to be more aware that some foods could make us or our baby become sick, people feel more and more concern about what they eat often (why this word?) daily. Moreover with the media coverage, a lot of secret truths came up like the addition of some addictives (spelling) or contaminants. Now it is the turn of genetically modified food which appears (you keep switching between past tense and present - this word should be past tense) at the end of the twentieth-century to cause a lot of concern. I do understand that. First, we are all aware that everything around us as a component (I don't understand) which can damage our lives or bring us disease and despite that, we can unfortunately not change anything. We cannot live any more without television or microwave. But we can still control what is on our dishes (this is awkward). Second, even though, many researches are (research - singular change all these words) done in order to show to consumers how healthy the genetically modified food can be, people are still worries (need past tense). For some of them, it is like you took away from them their freedom of choosing what they want to eat. Now, if you want to eat healthy food, you have to pay a little more.
To sum up, I would say that the society want does not agree in number with "the society" to control everything in our lives and sometimes can provide us unhealthy foods if they can make profits. If some group like test Achat did not exist to protect and to warn consumers, we would have already developed some new diseases.
Good job.
Doug
Réponse: IELTS practise exercises4 de elasista, postée le 29-05-2011 à 11:51:05 (S | E)
Hello,
Thank you so much Doug.
I guess I still need some practice
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Modifié par lucile83 le 29-05-2011 12:32
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