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Message de x-mandina posté le 04-01-2011 à 12:58:27 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
J'ai à décrire l'image d'une femme qui semble être africaine et qui porte un seau sur la tête et un bébé. Derrière, il apparait des bidonvilles.
Pourriez-vous me dire où sont mes fautes dans cette description et me dire si celle-ci est assez complète?
Voilà le texte :
This document is a black and white picture.
It was taken by a photographer.
There are not a caption, a title or a bubble, so we can imagine where and when has been this picture.
It consists of a woman, a baby and buildings. Perhaps, it is a close-up of an African woman. Behind this person, it seems to have slums.
The woman carries a headscarf on her head on which put a pail. She tears a skirt with flowers and a tee shirt.
On her back, she carries a baby. He attaches with a big headscarf. This person is standing.
Behind, it is slums because the walls look like more at cardboard than concrete.
The photographer highlights poverty of the country where was taken this picture and the condition life too.
I suppose the woman lives in a slum with several children. She works hard to need and to tend the latter. Her conditions of life are intolerable for humans being.
This picture aims to sit up and take notice. It can be on a prospectus for an association like UNICEF, for the readers do donations.
In my opinion, this picture remembers me there are poor people on the world. This picture commemorate us the reality.
Merci beaucoup d'avance!
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Modifié par lucile83 le 04-01-2011 14:42
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Modifié par x-mandina le 04-01-2011 16:18
Réponse: Description d'une image/correction de alphonse46, postée le 04-01-2011 à 17:04:09 (S | E)
Good afternoon, Mandina
This document is a black and white(black-and-white) picture.
It was taken by a photographer.
There are not a caption, a title or a bubble, so we can imagine where and when has been(tense)(+ verb) this picture.
It consists of a woman,(avec) a baby and buildings. Perhaps, it is a close-up of an African woman. Behind this person, it seems to have slums.
The woman carries a headscarf on her head on which put a pail. She tears a skirt with flowers and a tee shirt.
On her back, she carries a baby. He attaches with a big headscarf. This person is standing.(how is she standing?)
Behind, it is slums because the walls look like more (adjective)at cardboard than concrete.
The photographer highlights(tense) poverty of the country where was taken this picture and the condition life(mode de vie) too.
I suppose the woman lives(tense) in a slum with several children. She works(tense) hard to need and to tend the latter: maladroit. Her conditions of life are (tense) intolerable for humans being.
This picture aims to sit up and take notice(mal dit, sans doute: prendre conscience..). It can(choose another verb) be on a prospectus for(appartenant?) an association like UNICEF, for(afin que) the readers do donations.
In my opinion, this picture remembers me there are poor people on the world. This picture commemorate(use another verb) us the reality.
Il est possible que j'ai pu oublier de signaler d'autres éléments que des anglicistes avisés ne manqueront pas de souligner
Réponse: Description d'une image/correction de x-mandina, postée le 04-01-2011 à 19:10:16 (S | E)
Voilà le texte corrigé, pouvez-vous me dire si il reste encore des fautes?
This document is a black-and-white picture.
It was taken by a photographer.
There aren’t caption, title or bubble, so we can imagine where and when was doing this picture.
It consists of a woman with baby and buildings. Perhaps, it is a close-up of an African woman. Behind this person, it seems to have slums.
The woman carries a headscarf on her head on which lay a pail. She wears a skirt with flowers and a T-shirt.
On her back, she carries baby. He holds with a big headscarf. This person is standing because she walks.
Behind, there are slums because the walls look like more cardboarding than hard-surfaced.
The photographer want to highlight poverty of the country where was taken this picture and the way of life too.
I suppose the woman is living in a slum with several children. She is working hard to offer a beautiful life at her children. Her way of life are intolerable for a human.
This picture aims to awake of the reality .It is be able to be on a prospectus for an association like UNICEF, in order that readers give donations.
In my opinion, this picture remembers me there are poor people in the world. This picture recall us the reality.
Merci d'avance!
Réponse: Description d'une image/correction de notrepere, postée le 04-01-2011 à 19:11:03 (S | E)
Hello!
In my opinion, this picture
Mauvaise traduction du verbe « se rappeler » mais la traduction que je vous ai donnée ne se trouve pas sur "wordreference.com". Donc, un cadeau pour la nouvelle année.
Il y a peut-être une ou deux autres corrections que je pourrais vous suggérer mais il faut faire les corrections d'alphonse46 en premier.
Amicalement
(Pardonnez mes fautes de grammaire française car ma correctrice n'est pas en ligne en ce moment.)
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Modifié par notrepere le 04-01-2011 19:11
Vous avez déjà posté votre correction!
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Modifié par lucile83 le 04-01-2011 19:14
Here I am...
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Modifié par notrepere le 04-01-2011 19:16
Hello Pink, I am so glad you follow me around! I am so lost without you!
Réponse: Description d'une image/correction de x-mandina, postée le 04-01-2011 à 19:18:51 (S | E)
Merci beaucoup!
Réponse: Description d'une image/correction de notrepere, postée le 04-01-2011 à 19:31:23 (S | E)
Bonjour!
Il faut revoir et étudier la différence entre l'emploi du temps présent et le temps présent continu.
There aren’t [je préfère: 'isn't a'] caption, title or bubble, so we can [je suggère 'je dois' en anglais] imagine where and when was doing this picture [mal dit: 'this picture was taken' serait mieux].
It consists of [pas le meilleur verbe: je suggère 'show' ou 'portray'] a woman with a baby and some buildings. Perhaps, it is a close-up of an African woman. Behind this person, it seems to have slums [pas les meilleurs mots: 'there appears to be some slums'].
The woman carries [présent continu (PC)] a headscarf on her head on which lay [s'asseoir] a pail. She wears [temps: PC] a skirt with flowers and a T-shirt.
On her back, she carries [temps: PC] baby. He holds [c'est une construction difficile, non? 'is being held'] with a big headscarf. This person is standing because she walks [temps: PC].
Behind, there are slums because the walls look like more [ordre des mots] cardboarding [à supprimer] than hard-surfaced.
The photographer want [accorde] to highlight poverty
I suppose the woman is living in a slum with several children. She is working hard to offer a beautiful life
This picture aims to awake of the reality .It is be able to be on a prospectus for an association like UNICEF, in order that readers give donations.
Je ne comprends pas le sens de ce paragraphe.
This picture recall us the reality. [n'a pas de sens]
Réponse: Description d'une image/correction de headway, postée le 04-01-2011 à 20:38:26 (S | E)
Bonsoir à tous,
une simple question.
Pourquoi ne mettrait-on pas: There is no caption, no title... ? à la place de "there isn't...".
Cordialement.
Headway.
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