Let's suggest /38

Let's suggest /38
Message de here4u posté le 13-05-2023 à 12:10:41 (S | E | F)
Hello, dear writers!

Another new topic for you to write about. I hope many will participate enthusiastically, and that you'll do it as well as ever...
I'm well aware that, at present, this will be a challenge to long weekends and multiple days off!

You mustn't be afraid of making mistakes... We LOVE mistakes, because they give us an opportunity to explain and correct!

Here is today's topic:
School or home? Which is the "more important" in a child's life? 140 to 160 words".

Voici le rappel des modalités de la première partie de l'exercice :
1. Je vous demande une EXPRESSION sur le sujet proposé à m’envoyer en mp dès que possible …
2. Le plus tôt possible, cette première expression sera publiée sur le Forum, et CHACUN sera libre de « corriger » UNE FOIS ( en collant le texte et indiquant les erreurs EN BLEU, et en soulignant ce qui vous semble maladroit et que vous voudriez changer, sans donner la « correction » (forme correcte), à ce moment là, comme il se doit.) Si un autre membre a déjà indiqué des erreurs en bleu, VOUS DEVEZ repartir de cette correction et la confirmer ou la corriger... Un seul essai à la fois sera publié pour corriger… Vous pourrez ensuite donner vos suggestions de correction (en vert!)

IMPORTANT ! Pour me faciliter le transfert des corrections successives de vos travaux sur le site, pourriez vous m'indiquer par un "(" le mot ou segment de phrase qui devrai(en)t être modifié(s), s'il vous plaît ?
ie. (I'm repeating for years... ou (was not only to want something,... Pourquoi ? Simplement parce que le site ne "garde" pas les indications de couleurs ou de soulignement etc. dès que l'on copie... Donc, je prends vos travaux, je les corrige au fur et à mesure avec les codes "bleu" ou "souligné" ou "vert", mais au moment où je vous poste la correction, je perds tout mon travail... et dois tout refaire mot à mot en direct avec deux fenêtres ou même deux écrans pour un travail fastidieux de copie point par point! Merci de votre aide !
Les modalités complètes sont accessibles sur le lien suivant :
Lien internet


( Je vous les rappellerai au fur et à mesure de la progression du travail )
Cet exercice sera ... ce que vous en ferez : ou ou **
Do your best, I trust You!
Correction en ligne le samedi 27 mai 2023.
J'attends vos envois en mp et publierai le premier dès que possible.

MAY THE FORCE BE WITH YOU and with us!

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Réponse : Let's suggest /38 de here4u, postée le 16-05-2023 à 11:50:33 (S | E)
Hello dears!

EXPRESSION N°1: please, indicate possible mistakes and underline what looks clumsy to you.

SCHOOL or Home which is the most important in the child life?
In my opinion, children need to play and share their secrets with other children of their age.
In school a child learns reading and writing, geography, mathematics etc... The school gives him the opportunity to acquire a competitive spirit. He builds a personality by comparing himself to other children.
School is a violent environment. However, this is beneficial because the child learns the different aspects of real life at a very young age, which will make him stronger to face the difficulties of life.
At home, what a child needs is love, care, comfort, calm and security. He must find a nest, a shelter. Parents must be tolerant but strict on the rules to respect.
Love and good education are the most important to give to a child.
A well- cared-for and educated child is, as happy at school as at home. 155 mots

de votre aide !

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Réponse : Let's suggest /38 de here4u, postée le 19-05-2023 à 17:35:56 (S | E)
Hello dears,

SCHOOL or Home which is the most important in the child life?

In my opinion, children need to play and share their secrets with other children of their age.
(In school a child learns reading and writing, geography, mathematics etc... The school gives him the opportunity to acquire a competitive spirit. He builds a personality by comparing himself to other children.
School is a violent environment. However, this is beneficial because the child learns the different aspects of real life at a very young age, which will make him stronger to face the difficulties of life.
At home, what a child needs is love, care, comfort, calm and security. He must find a nest, a shelter. Parents must be tolerant but strict on the rules to respect.
Love and good education are the most important to give to a child.
A well- cared-for and educated child is, as happy at school as at home. 155 mots

GREEN ALLOWED.

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Réponse : Let's suggest /38 de magie8, postée le 20-05-2023 à 03:11:13 (S | E)
Hello dears,

SCHOOL or Home which is the most important in the child life?

In my opinion, children need to play and share their secrets with other children of their age.
(In school a child learns reading and writing, geography, mathematics etc...( School )gives him the opportunity to acquire a competitive spirit. He (finds his) personality by comparing( (with ) other children.
School is a violent environment. However, this is beneficial because the child learns the different aspects of real life at a very young age, which will make him stronger to face the difficulties of life.
At home, what a child needs is love, care, comfort, calm and security. He must find a nest, a shelter. Parents must be tolerant but( give good behavior rules and enforce them).
Love and good education are the most important ( things ) to give to a child.OR ( are what is most important to give )or Give love and good education to your children is the best you can do.
A well- cared-for and educated child is, as happy at school as at home. 155 mots
Thank you for your help

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Réponse : Let's suggest /38 de here4u, postée le 22-05-2023 à 09:45:39 (S | E)
Hello,

Here's EXPRESSION N°2! please indicate possible mistakes and underline what you think is clumsy...


To my opinion home is more important that school. In a home, a child has love of parents, confort, treatment, food and a lot of more, but love is the more important. A father and a mother are models and they show to the kids all what they must know. They show them the important worths of life : honesty, courage, to respect laws, know their rights and duty. But many parents have not time , and patience (or knowledge) to teach to their children what they must know, and this is why they put them to school. A few of parents « home teach » their children, but they are in minority. The real problem is parents have and take not time enough to teach kids good manners and they are too tired. But what is important is to recieve love. 132 words

for your help!

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Réponse : Let's suggest /38 de magie8, postée le 24-05-2023 à 07:23:47 (S | E)
Hello,
Mon essai de correction

text 2

(( To my opinion home is more important (that school. In a home, a child has love of parents, (confort, treatment, food and a lot( of more, but love is the more important. A father and a mother are models and they show to the kid ( all what they must know.
They show them the important (worths of life : honesty, courage, to respect laws, know their rights and duty. But many parents have not time , and patience (or knowledge) to teach to their children what they must know, and this is why they put them to school.( A few of parents ( home teach their children, but they are( in minority. The real problem is parent( have (and take not (time enough to teach kids good manners and they are too tired. But what is important is to (recieve love. 132 words

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Modifié par lucile83 le 24-05-2023 15:52
Bug police réparé.

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Réponse : Let's suggest /38 de amalia80, postée le 24-05-2023 à 09:44:23 (S | E)
Réponse : Let's suggest /38
Hello , J'ai repris les corrections de Magie et j'en ai ajouté d'autres

text 2

((To my opinion home is more important( that school.[(bleu](In a home, a child has (xx love of( xx parents, (confort, treatment, food and ( a lot of more, but love is the ( more m important. A father and a mother are models and they show ( to the kid ( all what they must know.
They show them the important ( worths of life : honesty, courage,( to respect the laws ,( know their rights and( duty . But many parents ( have not time and pa patience (or knowledge) to teach ( to their children what they( must know, and this is why they put them ( to school.(A few of parents home teach their children , but they are( in minority. The real problem is( xx parent have and take not time enough teach (xxkids good manners and they are too tired. But what is important is to (recieve love. 132 words

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Réponse : Let's suggest /38 de amalia80, postée le 24-05-2023 à 15:42:50 (S | E)
hello!
Expression1: suggestions
Hello dears,

SCHOOL or Home which is the most important in( a child's life ?

In my opinion, children need to play and share their secrets with other children of their age.
( At school a child learns reading and writing, geography, mathematics etc... (School gives him the opportunity to ( develop a competitive spirit. He( construsts a personality by comparing ( him to other children.
School is a violent environment. However, this is beneficial because the child learns ( at an early age about the different aspects of real life , which will make him stronger to face the difficulties of life.
At home,( a child needs love , care, comfort, calm and security. He( needs to find a nest, a shelter. Parents must be tolerant but strict( about the rules
Love and good education are the most important to give to a child.
A well- cared-for and( well educated child is, as happy at school as at home. 155 mots

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Réponse : Let's suggest /38 de amalia80, postée le 25-05-2023 à 13:50:27 (S | E)
Hello !
TEXT NUMBER 2 SUGGESTIONS
text 2

(( in my opinion home is more important( than school.[(bleu](At home, a child has ( the love of( his parents, (confort, treatment, food and ( many other things, but love is the ( most important. A father and a mother are models and they show ( their children all what they need to know.
They show them the important ( values of life : honesty, courage,( respect for the laws ,( knowing their rights and( duties . But many parents ( don't have the time or the patience (or knowledge) to teach ( their children what they( need to know, and this is why they put them ( in school.( Some parents( teach their children at home , but they are( a minority. The real problem is( that parents don't have or don't take enough time
to teach their kids good manners and they are too tired. But what is important is to ( receive love. 132 words

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Réponse : Let's suggest /38 de here4u, postée le 26-05-2023 à 13:49:55 (S | E)
Hello!
Réponse : Let's suggest /38 de here4u, postée le 24-05-2023 à 22:26:53 (S | E)
Hello dear workers!

EXPRESSION N°3: please indicate possible mistakes and underline what you think is clumsy...

From a very early age, if they go to nursery-school, children learn to live in community and become more sociable by playing with others.Later, in primary and secondary school, they are expected to observe certain rules of discipline, to follow schedules and to execute tasks in a given time.It is in the midst of their classmates and their teachers that they will acquire (or not!) this good team spirit and emulation.
At home, children need to receive the affection of their parents who, while loving them , must instil in them the very important rules of respect for others and courtesy. Of course , parents take care of their children, but they can ask them to participate in the family life with easy tasks adapted to their ages.
I think, that School and Home are complementary in order to prepare a child to become a responsible and happy adult. 150words

for your help!

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Réponse : Let's suggest /38 de here4u, postée le 26-05-2023 à 13:51:35 (S | E)
Hello dears,
Réponse : Let's suggest /38 de here4u, postée le 26-05-2023 à 10:27:46 (S | E)
Hello!

No «indications» for EXPRESSION N°3? Please, help! Green allowed tomorrow morning!

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Réponse : Let's suggest /38 de magie8, postée le 27-05-2023 à 07:09:00 (S | E)
hello
From a very early age, if they go to nursery school( or pre-school), children learn to live in community and become more sociable by playing with others. Later, in primary(or elementary) and secondary school, they are expected to observe (or(respect,) certain (or(some) rules of discipline, to follow schedules and to execute tasks in a given time.It is in the midst of (or ( amongst) their classmates and their teachers that they will acquire (or not!) this good team spirit and emulation.
At home, children need to receive the affection(from their parents who, while loving them , must instil in( incultate)them the very important rules of respect for others and courtesy. Of course, parents take care of ( or look after) their children, but they can ask them to participate in the family life with easy tasks adapted to their ages.
I think, that* school and home are complementary in order to prepare a child to become a responsible and happy adult. 150words

J' ai passé des heures à chercher, je ne trouve qu'une petite faute de préposition et 2 majuscules sans raison ( ne font pas partie d' un titre) . J'ai trouvé d' autres façons de dire la même chose avec d'autres mots. Mais il n'y avait rien à changer
*On pourrait dire : school and home complement each other with the aim of preparing a child...
are complemantary in order to = pour moi, c'est bon aussi.

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Réponse : Let's suggest /38 de amalia80, postée le 27-05-2023 à 12:31:43 (S | E)
Hello!
j'avais mis une majuscule à school et home pour montrer leur importance; à l'oral, j'aurais insisté sur la prononciation de ces mots.Merci Magie pour les corrections.

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Réponse : Let's suggest /38 de here4u, postée le 27-05-2023 à 23:41:54 (S | E)
Hello dears,

Voici les corrections des trois EXPRESSIONS:

EXPRESSION N°1: preliminary indications and my "help".

School or Home, which is the most important in (the child life?
In my opinion, children need to play and share their secrets with other children of their age.
(In school a child learns "reading and writing, geography, mathematics" etc... (The school gives him the opportunity to acquire a competitive spirit. He builds a personality by comparing himself to other children.
School is a violent environment.( ? A shocking statement!) However, this is beneficial because (the child learns the different aspects of real life at a very young age, which will make him stronger to face the difficulties of life.(I'd much prefer plural)
At home, what (a child needs is love, care, comfort, calm and security. (He must find a nest, a shelter. Parents must be tolerant but strict (on the rules to respect.
Love and good education are the most important xxxxxx to give (to (a child.
A well- cared-for and educated child is(, as happy at school as at home. 155 mots(Etrange « conclusion »). Une bonne expression.


In my opinion, children need to play and share their secrets with other children of their age.
(In school a child learns reading and writing,* geography, mathematics etc...( School )gives him the opportunity to acquire a competitive spirit. He (finds his) personality by comparing(XXXXXXX (with ) other children.**
School is a violent environment. However, this is beneficial because the child learns the different aspects of real life at a very young age, which will make him stronger to face the difficulties of life.
At home, what a child needs is love, care, comfort, calm and security. He must find a nest, a shelter. Parents must be tolerant but( give good (behavior rules and enforce them).
Love and good education are the most important ( things ) to give( to a child.OR ( are what is most important to give )or Give love and good education to your children is the best you can do.
A well- cared-for and educated child is, as happy at school as at home. 155 mots

- Traditionally at school children were taught: the 3Rs: Reading, wRiting and aRithmetic.
** je mettrais tout au pluriel pour éviter de devoir mettre un pronom pluriel juste à côté de «child»; Le pluriel passe d’ailleurs mieux…
- Voir difference entre in/at school.
Lien internet

Lien internet


_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

EXPRESSION N°2: initial indications:

(To my (opignon home is more important (that school. In a home, a child has xxx love of xxx parents, (confort, treatment, food and a lot (of more, but love is the (more important xxxxx . A father and a mother are models and they show (to the kids all (what they must know. They show them the important (worths of life: honesty, courage, to respect laws, know their rights and (duty. But many parents have (not time , and patience (or knowledge) to teach (to their children what they must know, and this is why they put them to school.( ??? a strange statement!) (A few (of parents « home teach » their children, but they are x minority. The real problem is xxxx parents have (and take not (time enough to teach kids good manners and they are too tired. But what is important is to receive love. 132 words

EXPRESSION N°2: Indications N°1

( To my opinion home is more important (that school. In a home, a child has love of parents, (confort, treatment, food and a lot( of more, but love is the more important XXXX. A father and a mother are models and they show to the kid ( all what they must know.
They show them the important (worths of life : honesty, courage, to respect laws, know their rights and duty. But many parents have not time , and patience (or knowledge) to teach to their children what they must know, and this is why they put them to school.( A few of parents ( home teach their children, but they are( in X minority. The real problem is parent( have (and take not (time enough to teach kids good manners and they are too tired. But what is important is to (recieve love. 132 words De bonnes indications

EXPRESSION N°2: Indications N°2

((To my opinion home is more important( that school.[(bleu](In a home, a child has (xx love of( xx parents, (confort, treatment, food and ( a lot of more, but love is the ( more important. A father and a mother are models and they show ( to the kid ( all what they must know.
They show them the important ( worths of life : honesty, courage,( to respect the laws ,( know their rights and( duty . But many parents ( have not time and patience (or knowledge) to teach ( to their children what they( must know, and this is why they put them (to school.(A few of parents home teach their children , but they are( in minority. The real problem is( xx parent have and take not time enough XX teach (xxkids good manners and they are too tired. But what is important is to (recieve love. 132 words

EXPRESSION N°2: suggestions:

(( in my opinion home is more important( than school.(At home, a child has ( the love of( his parents, (confort, treatment, food and ( many other things, but love is the ( most importantXXX . A father and a mother are models and they show ( their children all what they need to know.
They show them the important ( values of life : honesty, courage,( respect for the laws ,( knowing their rights and( duties . But many parents ( don't have the time or the patience (or knowledge) to teach ( their children what they( need to know, and this is why they put them ( in school.( Some parents( teach their children at home , but they are( a minority. The real problem is( that parents don't have or don't take enough time to teach their kids good manners and they are too tired. But what is important is to ( receive love. 132 words
Ouf! D'excellentes corrections !

Pour l'auteur de l'expression:
- reprendre les comparatifs (more ... than); beaucoup plus: a lot more. S'il y a une comparaison entre plus de deux éléments, utiliser un superlatif.
- ne pas oublier qu'un nom abstrait est déterminé lorsqu'il est suivi de "of"
- what: ce que // all that: tout ce que.
- construction de "show": Lien internet
et aussi to teach : Lien internet

- worth: la valeur d'un objet, mais pas une valeur morale.
- quelques parents: a few parents/ some parents

__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

EXPRESSION N°3: preliminary indications

From a very early age, if they go to nursery-school, children learn to live in community and become more sociable by playing with others. Later, in primary and secondary school, they are expected to observe certain rules of discipline, to follow schedules and to execute tasks in a given time. It is in the midst of/ among their classmates and their teachers that they will acquire (or not! let's not be pessimistic! ) this good team spirit and emulation.
At home, children need to receive the affection of their parents who, while loving them, must instil in them the very important rules of respect for others and courtesy. Of course, parents take care of their children, but they can ask them to participate in the family life with easy tasks/ chores adapted to their ages.
I think, that School and Home are complementary in order to prepare a child to become a responsible and happy adult. 150words

Très très bonne expression ! Tu pouvais chercher longtemps, magie, il n'y avait rien à redire à ce texte.

Lien internet


Bravo et pour ce bon travail !

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