RYB/ let's suggest-3
Cours gratuits > Forum > Exercices du forum || En basRYB/ let's suggest-3
Message de here4u posté le 27-11-2021 à 22:06:34 (S | E | F)
Hello, dear Workers!
Merci à ceux qui ont bien voulu travailler sur les premiers sujets que je vous ai donnés. En voici un autre, très différent !
Voici le rappel des modalités de la première partie de l'exercice :
1. Je vous demande une EXPRESSION sur un sujet imposé (un sujet unique par exercice) à m’envoyer en mp dès maintenant … (=> 130 - 150 mots au maximum - un seul envoi par personne.)
2. Le plus tôt possible, une première expression est publiée sur Forum, et CHACUN est libre de « corriger » UNE FOIS ( en collant le texte et indiquant les fautes EN BLEU, et en soulignant ce qui vous semble maladroit et que vous voudriez changer. sans donner la «correction » (forme correcte), comme il se doit.) Un seul devoir à corriger à la fois sera publié…
Les modalités entières sont accessibles : Lien internet
( je vous les rappellerai au fur et à mesure de la progression du travail ).
Le sujet, cette fois-ci est beaucoup moins philosophique que le précédent (quoique … !
) 
Write your « letter to Santa Claus » asking him to fulfill your dearest wishes for the end of the year… (Do not make a list, but develop one or two wishes…)
THE FORCE is with you… I’m expecting your tries as soon as possible. 
Cet exercice est un ou 3 et les corrigés seront en ligne le samedi 11 décembre 2021.
Message de here4u posté le 27-11-2021 à 22:06:34 (S | E | F)
Hello, dear Workers!
Merci à ceux qui ont bien voulu travailler sur les premiers sujets que je vous ai donnés. En voici un autre, très différent !
Voici le rappel des modalités de la première partie de l'exercice :
1. Je vous demande une EXPRESSION sur un sujet imposé (un sujet unique par exercice) à m’envoyer en mp dès maintenant … (=> 130 - 150 mots au maximum - un seul envoi par personne.)
2. Le plus tôt possible, une première expression est publiée sur Forum, et CHACUN est libre de « corriger » UNE FOIS ( en collant le texte et indiquant les fautes EN BLEU, et en soulignant ce qui vous semble maladroit et que vous voudriez changer. sans donner la «correction » (forme correcte), comme il se doit.) Un seul devoir à corriger à la fois sera publié…
Les modalités entières sont accessibles : Lien internet
( je vous les rappellerai au fur et à mesure de la progression du travail ).
Le sujet, cette fois-ci est beaucoup moins philosophique que le précédent (quoique … !
) 
Write your « letter to Santa Claus » asking him to fulfill your dearest wishes for the end of the year… (Do not make a list, but develop one or two wishes…)
THE FORCE is with you…
I’m expecting your tries as soon as possible. 
Cet exercice est un
ou 3 et les corrigés seront en ligne le samedi 11 décembre 2021. Réponse : RYB/ let's suggest-3 de here4u, postée le 28-11-2021 à 12:30:10 (S | E)
Hello!
Here's the first try!
Thanks a lot for the eagerness to work quickly and enabling us to work fast too. EXPRESSION N°1:
Dear Santa,
I still believe in you: you've never disappointed me.
What I would like you to do this year is something extremely difficult : eradicate the COVID-19 and all its mutations so that everybody can live freely. I'm especially thinking of the omicron variant: may the vaccines be still effective against it. And may all people come to their senses and realise that vaccination is the best way to get rid of this awful disease.
I wish you could make uncooperative people more aware of the risks they take for themselves, their families and the others. Do they have to get infected to understand at last? How many people have changed their minds after a stay in intensive care?
I know I'm asking too much and if you can't make it, I'll love you all the same. (142 W)
Vous pouvez signaler les éventuelles erreurs en bleu et souligner ce qui vous semble maladroit.
de votre investissement. Réponse : RYB/ let's suggest-3 de maxwell, postée le 30-11-2021 à 20:54:52 (S | E)
Hello!
I thought there was nothing wrong with it, but there's still room for improvement...
EXPRESSION N°1:
Dear Santa,
I still believe in you: you've never disappointed me.
What I would like you to do this year is something extremely difficult : eradicate the COVID-19 and all its mutations so that everybody can live freely. I'm especially thinking of the omicron variant: may the vaccines be still effective against it. And may all people come to their senses and realise that vaccination is the best way to get rid of this awful disease.
I wish you could make uncooperative people more aware of the risks they take for themselves, their families and the others. Do they have to get infected to understand at last? How many people have changed their minds after a stay in intensive care?
I know I'm asking too much and if you can't make it, I'll love you all the same. (142 W)
Réponse : RYB/ let's suggest-3 de here4u, postée le 30-11-2021 à 21:47:18 (S | E)
Hello, You all! There's always room for improvement!
Corrections en vert à partir de demain matin !
Réponse : RYB/ let's suggest-3 de maxwell, postée le 01-12-2021 à 07:06:52 (S | E)
hello
EXPRESSION N°1:
Dear Santa,
I still believe in you: you've never disappointed me.
What I would like you to do this year is something extremely difficult : eradicate the COVID-19 and all its mutations so that everybody can live freely. I'm thinking about the omicron variant in particular: may the vaccines be still effective against it. And may all people come to their senses and realise that vaccination is the best way to get rid of this awful disease.
I wish you could make uncooperative people more aware of the risks they take for themselves, their families and the others. Do they have to get infected to understand at last? How many people have changed their minds after a stay in intensive care?
I know I'm asking too much and if you can't make it, I'll love you all the same. (142 W)
Réponse : RYB/ let's suggest-3 de here4u, postée le 01-12-2021 à 20:32:18 (S | E)
Hello dears,
EXPRESSION N°1: Now considered very correct.
Dear Santa,
I still believe in you: you've never disappointed me.
What I would like you to do this year is something extremely difficult : eradicate the COVID-19 and all its mutations so that everybody can live freely. I'm thinking about the omicron variant in particular: may the vaccines be still effective against it. And may all people come to their senses and realise that vaccination is the best way to get rid of this awful disease.
I wish you could make uncooperative people more aware of the risks they take for themselves, their families and XXXXX the others. Do they have to get infected to understand at last? How many people have changed their minds after a stay in intensive care?
I know I'm asking too much and if you can't make it, I'll love you all the same. (142 W)
EXPRESSION N° 2: please, indicate the mistakes in blue and underline what you would change...
1) First of all I would like to be rid of covid I am tired of masks, tests and constraints and prohibitions. when we think we are out of the woods, another more violent one comes along
2) Secondly, it would be nice if all human beings had access to drinking water and food, if the earth's resources were better shared. The northern hemisphere wastes and the south has nothing.The northern hemisphere wastes and the south has nothing.
3) All plastic objects should no longer be manufactured or bought, and appliances should be repaired more and last longer. The planet is overflowing with waste.
We no longer know what to do with it or where to put it STOP TRANSFORMING THE EARTH INTO A BIN.
4)let each individual respect the other (130)
Réponse : RYB/ let's suggest-3 de polinho, postée le 02-12-2021 à 10:12:56 (S | E)
Dear Santa,
I still believe in you: you've never disappointed me.
What I would like you to do this year is something extremely difficult : eradicate the COVID-19 and all its mutations so that everybody could live freely. I'm especially thinking about the omicron variant: the vaccines might be still effective against it. And may each people come to their senses and realise that vaccination is the best way to get rid of this awful disease.
I wish you could make uncooperative people more aware of the risks they take for themselves, their families and the others. Do they have to get infected to understand at last? How many people have changed their mind after a stay in intensive care?
I know I'm asking too much and if you can't make it, I'll love you all the same. (142 W)
Réponse : RYB/ let's suggest-3 de here4u, postée le 02-12-2021 à 10:36:37 (S | E)
Hello!
Welcome on this thread, polinho!
Hum hum... Attention ! Nous sommes maintenant en train de corriger EXPRESSION N° 2! ...
You can add your work, (editing your post). If you're correcting Exp. 2 "live", don't forget to write IN PROGRESS so that everyone can know the thread is "frozen" and all yours...
(And don't forget to delete the warning when you have finished so that other members can go on! )Take care... THE FORCE is with you!
Réponse : RYB/ let's suggest-3 de polinho, postée le 02-12-2021 à 11:31:16 (S | E)
sorry sometimes I take liberties Can I cross words ? 
I did it 
1) First of all I would like to get rid of covid because I am tired of masks, tests,
2) Secondly, it would be nice if every human being had access to
3) All plastic objects should no longer be manufactured or
We no longer know what to do with it or where to put it : STOP TRANSFORMING THE EARTH INTO A BIN.
4)let each individual respect the other. (130)
Réponse : RYB/ let's suggest-3 de maxwell, postée le 02-12-2021 à 21:06:13 (S | E)
Hello!
EXPRESSION 2 :
1) First of all (punctuation) I would like to be rid of covid (punctuation) I am tired of masks, tests and constraints and prohibitions. when we think we are out of the woods, another more violent one comes along(punctuation)
2) Secondly, it would be nice if all human beings had access to drinking water and food, if the earth's resources were better shared. The northern hemisphere wastes and the south has nothing.The northern hemisphere wastes and the south has nothing. (repeated)
3) All XXX plastic objects should no longer be manufactured or bought, and appliances should be repaired more XXX and last longer. The planet is overflowing with waste.
We no longer know what to do with it or where to put it (punctuation) STOP TRANSFORMING THE EARTH INTO A BIN.
4)let each individual respect the other (punctuation)(130)
Réponse : RYB/ let's suggest-3 de here4u, postée le 03-12-2021 à 13:06:39 (S | E)
Hello, dears
C’est parti pour les corrections en vert !
Réponse : RYB/ let's suggest-3 de maxwell, postée le 03-12-2021 à 13:50:07 (S | E)
Hello!
EXPRESSION 2 :
First of all, I would like to get rid of COVID-19. I am tired of masks, tests, constraints and prohibitions. Whenever we think we are out of the woods, another more violent variant comes along...
Secondly, it would be nice if all human beings had access to drinking water and food and if the earth's resources were better shared. The northern hemisphere wastes and the south has nothing.
Thirdly, all the plastic objects should no longer be manufactured or bought; appliances should be repaired more frequently and last longer. The planet is overflowing with waste. We no longer know what to do with it or where to put it! Stop transforming the Earth into a bin!
Finally, let each individual respect the other. (130)
Réponse : RYB/ let's suggest-3 de here4u, postée le 05-12-2021 à 11:54:26 (S | E)
Hello, dear workers!
EXPRESSION 2 :disons que les corrections sont terminées !
First of all, I would like to get rid of COVID-19. I am tired of masks, tests, constraints and prohibitions. Whenever we think we are out of the woods, another more violent variant comes along...
Secondly, it would be nice if all human beings had access to drinking water and food and if the earth's resources were better shared. The northern hemisphere wastes and the south has nothing.
Thirdly, all the plastic objects should no longer be manufactured or bought; appliances should be repaired more frequently and last longer. The planet is overflowing with waste. We no longer know what to do with it or where to put it! Stop transforming the Earth into a bin!
Finally, let each individual respect the other. (130)
EXPRESSION N° 3:
Dear santa claus,
I have a dream, I know it is not difficult to make it come true. My wish is that I will trvel around the world and discover all the cultures and customs of other countries and bring back so many gifts to my family from each contry where I am to be able to keep them as memories and to prov to them that the world is small. and that we must remain cloistered in our shell afraid of having new friends with new thoughts. Please santa claus, don't mess me up. I have waited impatiently for you to ask, so I trust you, please realize my dream! I will be the happiest and luckiest in the world.
See you that my dream is easy for you. 131 words
Mistakes in blue, please; indicate what is clumsy underlying it; Thanks a lot for your help!
Réponse : RYB/ let's suggest-3 de maxwell, postée le 05-12-2021 à 13:39:14 (S | E)
Hello
EXPRESSION N° 3:
Dear santa claus,
I have a dream, I know it is not difficult to make it come true. My wish is that I will trvel around the world and discover all the cultures and customs of other countries and bring back so many gifts to my family from each contry where I am to be able to keep them as memories and to prov to them that the world is small. and that we must remain cloistered in our shell afraid of having new friends with new thoughts. Please santa claus, don't mess me up. I have waited impatiently for you to ask, so I trust you, please realize my dream! I will be the happiest and luckiest XXXX in the world.
See you that my dream is easy for you. 131 words
Réponse : RYB/ let's suggest-3 de magie8, postée le 05-12-2021 à 20:13:48 (S | E)
HELLO voici ma correction , désolée , je n' ai pas respecté le protocole car j' en suis incapable. Mais au moins j ai essayé de faire quelque chose .
RYB 3
JE DEMANDE VOTRE INDULGENCE
Dear Santa Claus,
I have a dream, I know it is not difficult to make it come true. My wish is TO TRAVEL around the world and discover all the cultures and customs of other countries and bring back so many gifts to my family from each COUNTRY where I am, THUS I COULD keep them as memories and to PROVE to them that the world is small. and that we HAVEN'T TO remain cloistered in our shell IN FEAR of having new friends with new thoughts. Please Santa Claus, don't FORGET me. I have waited impatiently TO ASK YOU, THEREFORE I trust you, please REALISE my dream! I will be the happiest and luckiest OF the world. YOU SEE that my dream is easy for you. 131 words
Réponse : RYB/ let's suggest-3 de maxwell, postée le 07-12-2021 à 07:48:15 (S | E)
hello Here4U
Avant de poster mes corrections, j'attends ton feu vert
Réponse : RYB/ let's suggest-3 de here4u, postée le 07-12-2021 à 08:29:35 (S | E)
Hello !
Good boy, Maxwell!
Vert autorisé… n’est-ce pas Magie !
( bon d’accord, tu n’as pas mis de vert … ) ! Réponse : RYB/ let's suggest-3 de maxwell, postée le 07-12-2021 à 20:05:04 (S | E)
Hello
EXPRESSION N° 3:
Dear Santa Claus,
I have a dream and I know it is not difficult to make it come true. My wish is to travel around the world and discover all the cultures and customs of other countries. I also wish I could bring back so many gifts for my family from each country I visit to keep them as memories; that way, I'd prove to them that the world is small and that we shouldn't remain cloistered in our shell afraid of making new friends and share new thoughts. Please Santa Claus, don't disappoint me! I've been waiting impatiently to ask you to grant my wishes and make my dream come true! I would be the happiest and luckiest boy in the world.
As you can see, my dream is not difficult for you to fulfill, is it? 131 words
(j'ai scindé une phrase qui était vraiment trop longue en 3 ! )
Réponse : RYB/ let's suggest-3 de here4u, postée le 07-12-2021 à 21:44:28 (S | E)
Hello, dear workers!
Here are your suggestions (and mine) for Expression 3 and the following try...
EXPRESSION N°3:Your suggestions:
Dear Santa Claus,
I have a dream, I know it is not difficult to make it come true. My wish is TO TRAVEL around the world and discover all the cultures and customs of other countries and bring back so many gifts to my family from each COUNTRY where I am, THUS I COULD keep them as memories
and to PROVE to them that the world is small. and that we HAVEN'T TO remain cloistered in our shell IN FEAR of having new friends with new thoughts. Please Santa Claus, don't FORGET me. I have waited impatiently TO ASK YOU, THEREFORE I trust you , please REALISE my dream! I will be the happiest and luckiest OF the world. YOU SEE that my dream is easy for you. 131 wordsDear Santa Claus,
I have a dream and I know it is not difficult to make it come true. My wish is to travel around the world and discover all the cultures and customs of other countries. I also wish I could bring back so many gifts for my family from each country I visit to keep them as memories; that way, I'd prove to them that the world is small and that we shouldn't remain cloistered in our shell afraid of making new friends and share new thoughts. Please Santa Claus, don't disappoint me! I've been waiting impatiently to ask you to grant my wishes and make my dream come true!
I would be the happiest and luckiest boy in the world.As you can see, my dream is not difficult for you to fulfill, is it? 131 words
Expression N° 3 is quite correct... and expecting further improvements in the Follow Up... 4) EXPRESSION N°4:
My wish is a little bit crazy !?
I would like to go to the biggest hotel of ice in the world, spanning over some 6,000 square metres, located in the village of Jukkasjärvi, in northern Sweden.
Every year, this hotel is rebuilt : when spring comes, everything melts away and returns to the Torne River .
Thus, architecture of the hotel changes : A few wellknown artists submit their ideas for deciding the shapes of the hall, bar, restaurants and rooms whose temperature or room temperature of which constantly around −5 °C (23 °F) ; and with a special design ... However, let's not forget : decoration, furniture and even the bed, are carved from ice. However, I was told : the beds are lined with reindeer furs, and we are givens pecial equipment, and we sleep in polar-tested sleeping bags.
As this hotel is located in the northern hemisphere ; If my dream comes true I would like to admire an aurora borealis161
Please, indicate the mistakes in blue, and underline what you consider clumsy...
Thanks for your work!
and Réponse : RYB/ let's suggest-3 de maxwell, postée le 08-12-2021 à 06:39:51 (S | E)
Hello!
4) EXPRESSION N°4:
My wish is a little bit crazy !?
I would like to go to the biggest hotel of ice in the world, spanning over some 6,000 square metres, located in the village of Jukkasjärvi, in northern Sweden.
Every year, this hotel is rebuilt : when spring comes, everything melts away and returns to the Torne River .
Thus, XXX architecture of the hotel changes : A few wellknown artists submit their ideas for deciding the shapes of the hall, bar, restaurants and rooms whose temperature or room temperature of which constantly around −5 °C (23 °F) ; and with a special design ... However, let's not forget : decoration, furniture and even the bed, are carved from ice. However, I was told : the beds are lined with reindeer furs, and we are givens pecial equipment, and we sleep in polar-tested sleeping bags.
As this hotel is located in the northern hemisphere ; If my dream comes true I would like to admire an aurora borealis 161
Réponse : RYB/ let's suggest-3 de here4u, postée le 09-12-2021 à 15:20:32 (S | E)
Hello you all!
Come on...
We need other suggestions! Réponse : RYB/ let's suggest-3 de here4u, postée le 09-12-2021 à 17:52:30 (S | E)
Hello!
Bon tant pis ...
Il reste une expression ... et je voudrais que vous puissiez suggérer des améliorations avant la deadline (samedi 11)
EXPRESSION N° 5:
I would like to go to Morocco with my family because it is a wonderful country with beautiful monuments.We will also eat in local restaurants. We will sleep in our campsite because it is heated and comfortable.
I would like the covid to stop because I would like to go out, but if I get my second dose in January. I would also like to see my uncle who has been in hospital for 2 weeks.
I would also like to see my uncle in hospital for the last 2 weeks and I would like both my wishes to come true this year or next year.106 words
Erreurs en bleu et maladresses soulignées jusque demain soir. Corrections en vert à partir de 20h demain !
(J'attends vos suggestions pour mieux gérer les délais de vos corrections
- le tout étant difficile à anticiper parce que nous ne connaissons pas le nombre de participations à l'avance) ...Réponse : RYB/ let's suggest-3 de maxwell, postée le 09-12-2021 à 20:22:14 (S | E)
Hello Here4U
J'attendais ton feu vert (impatiemment...)
4) EXPRESSION N°4:
My wish is a little crazy...
I would like to go to the biggest icehotel in the world, covering some 6,000 square metres, located in the village of Jukkasjärvi, in northern Sweden.
Every year, this hotel is rebuilt: when spring comes, everything melts away and returns to the Torne River.
Thus, the architecture of the hotel changes: A few well-known artists submit their ideas to decide the shapes of the hall, bar, restaurants and rooms with a special design. However, let's not forget: the temperature is constantly kept around −5 °C (23 °F); all the decoration, the furniture and even the bed are carved out of the ice. As I was told, the beds are filled with reindeer furs; and we are given a special equipment and we sleep in polar-tested sleeping bags.
As this hotel is located in the northern hemisphere, if my dream comes true, I would also like to admire an aurora borealis 161
EXPRESSION N° 5:
I would like to go to Morocco with my family because it is a wonderful country with beautiful monuments.We will also eat in local restaurants. We will sleep in our campsite because it is heated and comfortable.
I would like the covid to stop because I would like to go out, but if I get my second dose in January. I would also like to see my uncle who has been in hospital for 2 weeks.
I would also like to see my uncle in hospital for the last 2 weeks (repeated)and I would like both my wishes to come true this year or next year.
Réponse : RYB/ let's suggest-3 de here4u, postée le 10-12-2021 à 21:05:54 (S | E)
Hello!
C'est parti pour vos suggestions en vert !
Réponse : RYB/ let's suggest-3 de maxwell, postée le 11-12-2021 à 07:48:09 (S | E)
hello!
EXPRESSION N° 5:
I would love to go to Morocco with my family because it is a wonderful country with beautiful monuments. We will eat in local restaurants and sleep in our campsite which is heated and comfortable.
I would like COVID-19 to stop so as I could go out, as soon as I get my second dose in January.
Besides, I would be glad to see my uncle who has been in hospital for the last two weeks.
Please Santa, make both my wishes come true either this year or next year.
J'ai essayé d'alléger en variant parce que ça faisait beaucoup trop de 'I would like to'
(et ça faisait beaucoup trop de also aussi)
Réponse : RYB/ let's suggest-3 de here4u, postée le 11-12-2021 à 23:44:07 (S | E)
Hello dear friends and co-workers!
Voici les corrections de votre Rack Your Brains: Let's suggest 3, dans l'ensemble bien réussi ...
Attention cependant à bien rester dans le sujet ...
Il s'agissait d'écrire une lettre pour faire des demandes ... exprimer des souhaits. EXPRESSION N°1:
Dear Santa,
I still ( ?*) believe in you: you've never disappointed me.
What I would like you to do this year is something extremely difficult : (eradicate the COVID-19 and all its mutations so that everybody can live freely. I'm especially thinking of the omicron variant: may the vaccines be still effective against it. And may all people come to their senses and realise that vaccination is the best way to get rid of this awful disease.
I wish you could make uncooperative people more aware of the risks they take for themselves, their families and XXXXX for (the) others. Do they have to get infected to understand at last? How many people have changed their minds after a stay in intensive care?
I know I'm asking too much (a lot) and if you can't make it, I'll love you all the same. (142 Words)
SUGGESTIONS Exp. 1:
* "still" laisse à penser que tu as été déçu par Santa et que malgré tout, tu l’aimes encore … (ce qui est contredit par la phrase suivante …)Je dirais simplement : ‘I do believe in you!’
- "eradicate the virus"; Il est déterminé ... OK mais toi, tu détermines le virus en donnant son nom => virus covid-19.(pas d'article)
"uncooperative people": Good informative link Lien internet
Lien internet
Lien internet
recalcitrant/ reluctant// anti-vaccine/ vaccine-sceptics/ anti-vaccine advocates/
EXPRESSION N°2:
First of all, I would like to get rid of COVID-19 (1). I am tired of masks, tests, constraints and prohibitions. (Whenever (2) we think we are out of the woods(3), another more violent variant comes along...
Secondly, it would be nice if all human beings had access to drinking water and food and if the earth's resources were better shared. The northern hemisphere wastes and the south has nothing.
Thirdly, all the plastic objects should no longer be manufactured or bought; appliances should be repaired more frequently and last longer. The planet is overflowing with waste. We no longer know what to do with it or where to put it! Stop transforming the Earth into a bin!
Finally, let each individual respect the other. (130 words)
SUGGESTIONS Exp. 2:
(1) C’est bien d’avoir réemployé l’expression « covid-19 » sans faute ! (Merci à l’auteur de l’expression 1) !
(2) Whenever: bonne idée car elle tient bien compte de la répétition de l’action : à chaque fois que/ quel que soit le moment où/
(3) To be out of the woods: être tiré d’affaire/ to be in the clear/ to be off the hook/ out of danger/ be home free/
(4) la planète Terre : la Terre : (le plus souvent avec une majuscule) : the Earth.
(5) « The northern hemisphere wastes » me gêne … Trouver autre chose …
(6) All plastic objects: all the plastic objects :
"All plastic objects should no longer be manufactured..." ne se dirait pas … A corriger !(construction différente pour la négation ...)
(7) appliances should be repaired more frequently: signifie que certains appareils doivent être réparés tous les deux jours (par exemple) au lieu de tous les 3 jours, même s’ils n’en ont pas vraiment besoin … Je ne pense pas que c’est ce que l’auteur voulait dire …
Comment dire alors que « le plus souvent, il faudrait réparer au lieu de jeter »?EXPRESSION N°3:
Dear Santa Claus,
*I have a dream and I know it is not difficult to make it come true. My wish is that I will travel around the world and discover all the cultures and customs of other countries.[punctuation and transitions ?] (and bring back (1)(so many gifts to my family from each country where
* Phrase beaucoup trop longue. Il faut couper … Cela peut être fait facilement par groupes de sens en ajoutant de la ponctuation et en utilisant des mots de liaison.
- to make a dream come true/ to fulfill a dream/ make a dream reality/
(1) many: beaucoup/ so many: tellement de
-
orthographe : «country»/ prove/ travel/ Majuscules à Santa Claus. (2)"memories": souvenirs dont on se souvient… « souvenirs » : objets que l’on rapporte, pour se souvenir d’un voyage particulier.
(3) "don’t mess me up" : un peu trop familier …Lien internet
(4) La construction n’est pas correcte : I have waited impatiently to ask you this ( ? – je suppose ?)
(5) «the luckiest» est la forme superlative de l’adjectif «lucky» : doit être suivie d’un nom.
4) EXPRESSION N°4:
My wish is a little bit crazy ! ? Pourquoi ce point d’interrogation ?
I would like to go to the biggest hotel of ice in the world B, spanning over some 6,000 square metres, located in the village of Jukkasjärvi, in northern Sweden.
Every year, this hotel is rebuilt: when spring comes, everything melts away and returns to the Torne River .
Thus, (XXX architecture of the hotel changes : A few well-known artists submit their ideas (for deciding the shapes of the hall, bar, restaurants and rooms whose temperature (or roomS XXX temperature of which constantly (around −5 °C (23 °F)(borders on… ); and with a special design ... However, let's not forget : xxx decoration, xxx furniture and even the bedS, are carved from ice. However, I was told : the beds are lined (filled) with reindeer furs, and we are given a special equipment, and we sleep in polar-tested sleeping bags.
As this hotel is located in the northern hemisphere (; (I)f my dream comes true I would also like to admire an aurora borealis. (161 words)
Le début fait un peu trop « publicité touristique » … Le sujet était «Your letter to Santa!» J’aurais aimé plus DE sentiments et réflexions personnelles de l’auteur …
- Je n’aime pas le but exprimé par « for + ing » qui indique plus clairement une conséquence (He was punished for cheating!= parce qu’il a triché.) Le But : to + base verbale/ in order to/ so as to
- Je pense que l’auteur voulait donner deux solutions pour exprimer « dont la température » : solution non puriste mais très commune (de plus en plus commune…
)= whose: rooms whose temperature … et solution puriste, mais plus du tout utilisée maintenant … : rooms the temperature of which … on dirait plutôt : « where the temperature … » - to border on : avoisiner.
- an equipment/ a special equipment.
EXPRESSION N°5:
I would like to go to Morocco with my family because it is a wonderful country with beautiful monuments. We will also( ?) eat in local restaurants. We will sleep in our campsite (1 ?)because it is heated and comfortable.
I would like the covid to stop because I would like to go out, but if I get my second dose in January. (?2) I would also like to (see ( ?go and visit) my uncle who has been in hospital for 2 weeks.
I would also like to see my uncle in hospital for the last 2 weeks (3) and I would like both my wishes B to come true this year or next year. (106 words)
YOUR SUGGESTIONS for Exp. N°5
I would love to go to Morocco with my family because it is a wonderful country with beautiful monuments. We will eat in local restaurants and sleep in our campsite which is heated and comfortable.
I would like COVID-19 to stop (so as I could (4)go out, as soon as I get my second dose in January.
Besides, I would be glad to see my uncle who has been in hospital for the last two weeks.
Please Santa, make both my wishes come true either this year or next year.
Encore un peu « léger » malgré l’ajout (130 mots mini demandés). Il faut apprendre à développer …
Ne pas oublier qu’il s’agit d’écrire une lettre … (début et fin doivent être présents.)
(1) Ok pour le « campsite » (terrain de camping) mais je comprends mal comment il est « chauffé ». Il nous fallait des explications complémentaires (bungalows which are heated?)
- Un peu trop de répétitions de « I would like » : trouver d’autres structures de « remplacement » … [Amusant ! Le « correcteur » maxwell l’a ressenti aussi et a corrigé en conséquence !
](2) pas certaine de comprendre la ponctuation …
(3) semble être une répétition de la phrase précédente (en moins clair !)
(4) Attention
! En corrigeant ainsi, une autre faute est rajoutée ! les expressions sont : so as TO= base verbale// so as NOT TO + base verbale. Si l’on met un auxiliaire derrière, il faut changer d’expression pour satisfaire la construction. => so THAT I could… Bien pour le présent derrière as soon as (conjonction de subordination temporelle).Bravo pour tous vos travaux !
Ceux d'entre vous qui le désirent (et le peuvent) ont "droit" à un Follow Up Work d'une expression ou de toutes (bien sûr!). Je relirai le tout ! Merci pour tout ce bon travail. Réponse : RYB/ let's suggest-3 de maxwell, postée le 12-12-2021 à 11:12:46 (S | E)
FINISHED
Hello!
Follow-up work:
1) EXPRESSION N°1:
Dear Santa,
I do believe in you: you've never disappointed me.
What I would like you to do this year is something extremely difficult : eradicate COVID-19 and all its mutations so that everybody can live freely. I'm especially thinking of the omicron variant: may the vaccines be still effective against it. And may all people come to their senses and realise that vaccination is the best way to get rid of this awful disease.
I wish you could make recalcitrant people more aware of the risks they take for themselves, their families and even for others. Do they have to get infected to understand at last? How many people have changed their minds after a stay in intensive care?
I know I'm asking a lot and if you can't make it, I'll love you all the same. (142 Words)
I stil believe in you : Je voulais dire : je crois toujours/encore en toi, sous-entendu : encore à mon âge (et non pas : quand même en toi). Donc il m'a semblé que still n'était pas mauvais. Qu'en dis-tu ?
je n'ai pas compris pourquoi il fallait enlever "the" devant "others" : est-ce qu'en mettant "for others", on traduit bien : "et pour les autres" (sous-entendu : "tous les autres")? Est-ce que "for the others" est incorrect et à remplacer par : "for everyone else" ?
2) YOUR SUGGESTIONS for Exp. N°2:
First of all, I would like to get rid of COVID-19. I am tired of masks, tests, constraints and prohibitions. Whenever we think we are out of the woods, another more violent variant comes along...
Secondly, it would be nice if all human beings had access to drinking water and food and if the Earth's resources were better shared. Basically, people living in the northern hemisphere tend to be more wasteful than people living in the south who are less wealthy.
Thirdly, all the plastic objects should no longer be manufactured or bought; appliances should be repaired more systematically and last longer. The planet is overflowing with waste. We no longer know what to do with it or where to put it! Stop transforming the Earth into a bin!
Finally, let each individual respect the other. (130 words)
3) YOUR SUGGESTIONS for Exp. N°3: Apparemment, Here4U n'y a pas trouvé d'erreurs
En revanche, on est bien d'accord qu'il fallait enlever "where" devant I visit : for each country I visit
Dear Santa Claus,
I have a dream and I know it is not difficult to make it come true. My wish is to travel around the world and discover all the cultures and customs of other countries. I also wish I could bring back so many gifts for my family from each country I visit to keep them as memories; that way, I'd prove to them that the world is small and that we shouldn't remain cloistered in our shell afraid of making new friends and share new thoughts. Please Santa Claus, don't disappoint me! I've been waiting impatiently to ask you to grant my wishes and make my dream come true! I would be the happiest and luckiest boy in the world.
As you can see, my dream is not difficult for you to fulfill, is it? 131 words
4) YOUR SUGGESTIONS for Exp. N°4: Apparemment, Here4U n'y a pas trouvé d'erreurs
My wish is a little crazy...
I would like to go to the biggest icehotel in the world, covering some 6,000 square metres, located in the village of Jukkasjärvi, in northern Sweden.
Every year, this hotel is rebuilt: when spring comes, everything melts away and returns to the Torne River.
Thus, the architecture of the hotel changes: A few well-known artists submit their ideas to decide the shapes of the hall, bar, restaurants and rooms with a special design. However, let's not forget: the temperature is constantly kept around −5 °C (23 °F); all the decoration, the furniture and even the bed are carved out of the ice. As I was told, the beds are filled with reindeer furs; and we are given a special equipment and we sleep in polar-tested sleeping bags.
As this hotel is located in the northern hemisphere, if my dream comes true, I would also like to admire an aurora borealis 161
5) YOUR SUGGESTIONS for Exp. N°5
I would love to go to Morocco with my family because it is a wonderful country with beautiful monuments. We will eat in local restaurants and sleep in our campsite which is heated and comfortable.
I would like COVID-19 to stop so that I could go out, as soon as I get my second dose in January.
Besides, I would be glad to see my uncle who has been in hospital for the last two weeks.
Please Santa, make both my wishes come true either this year or next year.
Réponse : RYB/ let's suggest-3 de magie8, postée le 12-12-2021 à 13:09:30 (S | E)
hello my suggestion 3
Dear Santa Claus,
I have a dream and I know it is not difficult to make it come true. My wish is to travel around the world and discover all the cultures and customs of other countries. I also wish I could bring back so many gifts for my family from each country I visit to keep them as souvenirs ; that way, I'd prove to them that the world is small and that we shouldn't remain cloistered in our shell afraid of making new friends and share new thoughts. Please Santa Claus, don't make mistake ! I've been waiting impatiently to ask you to grant my wishes and make my dream come true! I would be the happiest and luckiest boy in the world.
As you can see, my dream is not difficult for you to fulfill, is it? 131 words
-------------------
Modifié par magie8 le 12-12-2021 13:14
Réponse : RYB/ let's suggest-3 de here4u, postée le 12-12-2021 à 14:39:05 (S | E)
Hello dears,
Proofreading of the Follow-up work:
1) EXPRESSION N°1:
Dear Santa,
I do believe in you: you've never disappointed me.
What I would like you to do this year is something extremely difficult : eradicate COVID-19 and all its mutations so that everybody can live freely. I'm especially thinking of the omicron variant: may the vaccines be still effective against it. And may all people everybody come to their senses and realise that vaccination is the best way to get rid of this awful disease.
I wish you could make recalcitrant people more aware of the risks they take for themselves, their families and even for others. Do they have to get infected to understand at last? How many people have changed their minds after a stay in intensive care?
I know I'm asking a lot and if you can't make it, I'll love you all the same. (142 Words)
I stil believe in you : Je voulais dire : je crois toujours/encore en toi, sous-entendu : encore à mon âge (et non pas : quand même en toi). Donc il m'a semblé que still n'était pas mauvais. Qu'en dis-tu ?
A partir du moment où tu dois justifier ce que tu voulais dire, c'est que ton discours est ambigu ... Donc, il faut t'exprimer autrement ...
je n'ai pas compris pourquoi il fallait enlever "the" devant "others" : est-ce qu'en mettant "for others", on traduit bien : "et pour les autres" (sous-entendu : "tous les autres")? Est-ce que "for the others" est incorrect et à remplacer par : "for everyone else" ?OK! others est plus général que "the others!"
2) YOUR SUGGESTIONS for Exp. N°2:
First of all, I would like to get rid of COVID-19. I am tired of masks, tests, constraints and prohibitions. Whenever we think we are out of the woods, another more violent variant comes along...
Secondly, it would be nice if all human beings had access to drinking water and food and if the Earth's resources were better shared. Basically, people living in the northern hemisphere tend to be more wasteful (OK!) than people living in the south who are less wealthy.
Thirdly, all the plastic objects should no longer be manufactured or bought(plastic objects should no longer be...); appliances should be repaired more systematically and last longer. The planet is overflowing with waste. We no longer know what to do with it or where to put it! Stop transforming the Earth into a bin!
Finally, let each individual respect the other. (130 words)
3) YOUR SUGGESTIONS for Exp. N°3:
En revanche, on est bien d'accord qu'il fallait enlever "where" devant I visit : for each country I visit (Of course!
)A) Dear Santa Claus,
I have a dream and I know it is not difficult to make it come true. My wish is to travel around the world and discover all the cultures and customs of other countries. I also wish I could bring back (
As you can see, my dream is not difficult for you to fulfill, is it? 131 words Maxwell:
B) Dear Santa Claus,
I have a dream and I know it is not difficult to make it come true. My wish is to travel around the world and discover all the cultures and customs of other countries. I also wish I could bring back
As you can see, my dream is not difficult for you to fulfill, is it? 131 words Magie:
4) YOUR SUGGESTIONS for Exp. N°4:
My wish is a little crazy...
I would like to go to the biggest icehotel in the world, covering some 6,000 square metres, located in the village of Jukkasjärvi, in northern Sweden.
Every year, this hotel is rebuilt: when spring comes, everything melts away and returns to the Torne River.
Thus, the architecture of the hotel changes: A few well-known artists submit their ideas to choose the shapes of the hall, bar, restaurants and rooms with a special design. However, let's not forget: the temperature is constantly kept around −5 °C (23 °F); all the decoration, the furniture and even the beds are carved out of ice. As I was told, the beds are filled with reindeer furs; and we are given a special equipment and we sleep in polar-tested sleeping bags.
As this hotel is located in the northern hemisphere, if my dream comes true, I would also like to admire an aurora borealis (161 words)
5) YOUR SUGGESTIONS for Exp. N°5
I would love to go to Morocco with my family because it is a wonderful country with beautiful monuments. We would eat in local restaurants and sleep in a heated and comfortable bungalow in a campsite.
I would like COVID-19 to stop, so that I could go out as soon as I've had my second dose in January.
Besides, I would be glad to see my uncle who has been in hospital for the last two weeks.
Please Santa, make both my wishes come true either this year or next year.
Un grand
aussi pour ce Follow up Work! Réponse : RYB/ let's suggest-3 de maxwell, postée le 12-12-2021 à 17:58:38 (S | E)
Hello Here4 et merci encore car on apprend tellement en comprenant les erreurs
Désolé, mais j'ai encore des questions :
Dans l'expression 1, pourquoi "everybody" est mieux que "all people"
Dans l'expression 3, qu'est-ce qui n'allait pas avec "so many gifts" (pour dire tant de cadeaux)
Réponse : RYB/ let's suggest-3 de here4u, postée le 12-12-2021 à 21:28:03 (S | E)
Hello Max!
I know you like asking questions...
- What shall I say? Well! I like it better!
Lien internet
=> "trust your gut!"
- "bring back so many gifts from foreign countries" sounds odd to me...
(it may not to other people... ) I "bring back many/ a lot of gifts from foreign countries..." Speaking is feeling too... Cours gratuits > Forum > Exercices du forum
