Rack your brains and help! /64
Cours gratuits > Forum > Exercices du forum || En basRack your brains and help! /64
Message de here4u posté le 12-02-2020 à 21:35:02 (S | E | F)
Hello, Dear Friends,
Voici la nouvelle édition du travail de "My Poor Student", who's trying so hard... Avec l'actualité du moment, il a bien du mal à trouver des sujets "originaux" mais pas trop catastrophiques, sinon "amusants" ... Aujourd'hui, il a eu envie de donner une toute petite lueur d'espoir quand tout semble bien difficile ...
Cet exercice est un
et sa correction sera en ligne le mercredi 26 février.
PLEASE, HELP MY STUDENT... He has left 20 mistakes in this text...(he has excuses, the text is quite long...)
(The 20 mistakes must be corrected IN CAPITAL LETTERS, please!
)
Prema and her husband had worked in a brick kiln, winning just enough to scrape a living together for their young family. But they had hoped for more. Her husband took off a loan to start his own brick kiln, but the plans failed to take up. In a moment of desperation last year, he killed himself.
The pressure fell solely on Prema not only to earn enough to feed, clothe and house herself and her three children, but also to pay back the money they owned for the failed business venture. And for a while she managed, taking her two youngest to work with her."When I go to work I get 200 rupees ($2.80) per day, which is enough to run our family," But she became ill, which meant she couldn't earn as much. She was sick for three months - by the end of when the bills had mounted, and the cupboards had run naked. "My seven years old son started crying due to anger." Prema had no property, jewellery, valuables or kitchen ustensils that could be exchanged for cash. "I didn't even have a 10 rupee note [$0.14; £0.11] with me" Then she realised she did have anything she could sell after all. ///END of PART 1 /// "I remembered a shop which used to buy hair," Prema says, thinking immediately of her own hair. India is one of the world top exporters of human hair, which is sold around the globe to make extensions. "I went there and sold my entire head of hair at 150 rupees ($2; £1.50) The respite was only temporary: Prema knew she was out of options, and her thoughts began to turn towards more drastic measures. She decided to find a way of taking her own life. She was saved by her sister, who happened to come by on time to stop her. And then, just few days later, the help she so desesperately needed appeared out of the blue.
Bala Murugan heard about Prema's situation. It immediately stroke a nerve: her struggle reminded him of his family's darkest hour: at the age of 10, his family ran out of food. In a state of utter despair, Bala's mother decided to kill herself and her children. She changed her mind at the last moment: the family rushed their mother to a doctor, and she was saved. ///END of PART 2 /// Bala now lives a life a world around from the situation he grew up. After years of struggle, he worked his way out of poverty and now owns a computer graphics centre. He gave Prema some money to buy food, then wrote about the family on social media. "Within a day I got 120,000 rupees ($1,670)." At Prema's request, the fundraising was stopped. "She said she would get back to her work and pay the rest," Prema is slowly getting back on her feet, but, sadly, her financial situation is far from unique. In spite of India's economic growth, millions like her struggle to put food on the table. Prema has another obstacle in her way: she cannot read nor write, like tens of millions of other Indians. As a result, she is unaware of government schemes which provide help to people like her. But thanks to her community and to Bala, she is able to see a way out of the cycle of poverty which has kept her trapped. "Now I realise suicide was the wrong decision," she says. "I am confident about paying back the rest of the loan."/// END of the TEXT ///.
Thanks a lot for your help ... Of course, THE FORCE IS WITH you! 
Message de here4u posté le 12-02-2020 à 21:35:02 (S | E | F)
Hello, Dear Friends,
Voici la nouvelle édition du travail de "My Poor Student", who's trying so hard... Avec l'actualité du moment, il a bien du mal à trouver des sujets "originaux" mais pas trop catastrophiques, sinon "amusants" ... Aujourd'hui, il a eu envie de donner une toute petite lueur d'espoir quand tout semble bien difficile ...
Cet exercice est un
et sa correction sera en ligne le mercredi 26 février.PLEASE, HELP MY STUDENT... He has left 20 mistakes in this text...(he has excuses, the text is quite long...)
(The 20 mistakes must be corrected IN CAPITAL LETTERS, please!
) Prema and her husband had worked in a brick kiln, winning just enough to scrape a living together for their young family. But they had hoped for more. Her husband took off a loan to start his own brick kiln, but the plans failed to take up. In a moment of desperation last year, he killed himself.
The pressure fell solely on Prema not only to earn enough to feed, clothe and house herself and her three children, but also to pay back the money they owned for the failed business venture. And for a while she managed, taking her two youngest to work with her."When I go to work I get 200 rupees ($2.80) per day, which is enough to run our family," But she became ill, which meant she couldn't earn as much. She was sick for three months - by the end of when the bills had mounted, and the cupboards had run naked. "My seven years old son started crying due to anger." Prema had no property, jewellery, valuables or kitchen ustensils that could be exchanged for cash. "I didn't even have a 10 rupee note [$0.14; £0.11] with me" Then she realised she did have anything she could sell after all. ///END of PART 1 /// "I remembered a shop which used to buy hair," Prema says, thinking immediately of her own hair. India is one of the world top exporters of human hair, which is sold around the globe to make extensions. "I went there and sold my entire head of hair at 150 rupees ($2; £1.50) The respite was only temporary: Prema knew she was out of options, and her thoughts began to turn towards more drastic measures. She decided to find a way of taking her own life. She was saved by her sister, who happened to come by on time to stop her. And then, just few days later, the help she so desesperately needed appeared out of the blue.
Bala Murugan heard about Prema's situation. It immediately stroke a nerve: her struggle reminded him of his family's darkest hour: at the age of 10, his family ran out of food. In a state of utter despair, Bala's mother decided to kill herself and her children. She changed her mind at the last moment: the family rushed their mother to a doctor, and she was saved. ///END of PART 2 /// Bala now lives a life a world around from the situation he grew up. After years of struggle, he worked his way out of poverty and now owns a computer graphics centre. He gave Prema some money to buy food, then wrote about the family on social media. "Within a day I got 120,000 rupees ($1,670)." At Prema's request, the fundraising was stopped. "She said she would get back to her work and pay the rest," Prema is slowly getting back on her feet, but, sadly, her financial situation is far from unique. In spite of India's economic growth, millions like her struggle to put food on the table. Prema has another obstacle in her way: she cannot read nor write, like tens of millions of other Indians. As a result, she is unaware of government schemes which provide help to people like her. But thanks to her community and to Bala, she is able to see a way out of the cycle of poverty which has kept her trapped. "Now I realise suicide was the wrong decision," she says. "I am confident about paying back the rest of the loan."/// END of the TEXT ///.
Thanks a lot for your help
... Of course, THE FORCE IS WITH you! 
Réponse : Rack your brains and help! /64 de magie8, postée le 17-02-2020 à 19:18:08 (S | E)
hello bon courage à tous 😐 BON à CORRIGER
Prema and her husband had worked in a brick kiln,EARNING just enough to scrape a living together for their young family. But they had hoped for more. Her husband took OUT a loan to start his own brick kiln, but the plans failed to take OFF . In a moment of desperation last year, he killed himself.
The pressure fell solely on Prema not only to earn enough to feed, clothe and house herself and her three children, but also to pay back the money they OWED for the failed business venture. And for a while she managed, taking her two youngest to work with her."When I go to work I get 200 rupees ($2.80) per day, which is enough to run our family," But she became ill, which meant she couldn't earn as much. She was sick for three months - by the end of WHICH the bills had mounted, and the cupboards had run BARE . "My SEVEN -YEAR-OLD son started crying due to HUNGER." Prema had no property, jewellery, valuables or kitchen ustensils that could be exchanged for cash. "I didn't even have a 10 rupee note [$0.14; £0.11] with me" Then she realised she did have SOMETHING she could sell after all. ///END of PART 1 /// "I remembered a shop which used to buy hair," Prema says, thinking immediately of her own hair. India is one of the world'S top exporters of human hair, which is sold around the globe to make extensions. "I went there and sold my entire head of hair FOR 150 rupees ($2; £1.50) The respite was only temporary: Prema knew she was out of options, and her thoughts began to turn towards more drastic measures. She decided to find a way of taking her own life. She was saved by her sister, who happened to come by IN time to stop her. And then, just A few days later, the help she so DESPERATELY needed appeared out of the blue.
Bala Murugan heard about Prema's situation. It immediately STRUCK a nerve: her struggle reminded him of his family's darkest hour: at the age of 10, his family ran out of food. In a state of utter despair, Bala's mother decided to kill herself and her children. She changed her mind at the last moment: the family rushed their mother to a doctor, and she was saved. ///END of PART 2 /// Bala now lives a life a world AWAY from the situation he grew up IN. After years of struggle, he HAS worked his way out of poverty and now owns a computer graphics centre. He gave Prema some money to buy food, then wrote about the family on social media. "Within a day I got 120,000 rupees ($1,670)." At Prema's request, the fundraising was stopped. "She said she would get back to her work and pay the rest," Prema is slowly getting back on her feet, but, sadly, her financial situation is far from unique. In spite of India's economic growth, millions like her struggle to put food on the table. Prema has another obstacle in her way: she cannot read OR write, like tens of millions of other Indians. As a result, she is unaware of government schemes which provide help to people like her. But thanks to her community and to Bala, she is able to see a way out of the cycle of poverty which has kept her trapped. "Now I realise suicide was the wrong decision," she says. "I am confident about paying back the rest of the loan."/// END of the TEXT ///.
je ferais le follow-up de la 1re partie
Réponse : Rack your brains and help! /64 de magie8, postée le 17-02-2020 à 20:10:14 (S | E)
BONJOUR j'ai posté un début de correction déjà bien avancée , j'avais repéré 15 ou 16 fautes et je ne le vois pas apparaître , donc je ne peux pas finir. j'attends un peu , et si mon travail est perdu je le recommencerais.
j'ai commencé aussi à préparer la traduction de la 1ere partie pour le follow up .
bon courage à tous 🎃😺😘
Réponse : Rack your brains and help! /64 de here4u, postée le 17-02-2020 à 23:19:11 (S | E)
Hello Magie !
On dirait que ton travail est là !
Réponse : Rack your brains and help! /64 de taiji43, postée le 18-02-2020 à 16:28:11 (S | E)
Good afternoon Here4U, MAXWELL, LUCILE 83 (our thinking heads) and and all those who work on this exercise...
After a day of reflexion
I am sending my correction although I am not sure of "past perfect" of" be used in the text", and " commit suicide ,and so on..."
thanks for the correction
READY TO BE CORRECTED
Prema and her husband had worked in a brick kiln, EARNING just enough to scrape a living together for their young family. But they had hoped for more. Her husband took OUT a loan to start his own brick kiln, but the plans failed to take OFF (démarrer) In a moment of desperation last year, he COMMITTED SUICIDE ( se suicider)
The pressure fell solely on Prema not only to earn enough to feed, clothe and house herself and her three children, but also to pay back the money they OWED for the failed business venture. And for a while she managed, TO TAKE her two youngest to work with her."
When I go to work I get 200 rupees ($2.80) per d AND ay, which is enough to run our family," But she became ill, which meant she couldn't earn as much. She was sick for three months -by the end or AT THE END of which (suppression de when) the bills had ACCUMULATED and the cupboards HAD EMPTIED
"My seven years old son started crying due to .hunger" Prema had no property, jewellery, valuables or kitchen ustensils that could be exchanged for cash. "I didn't even have a 10 rupee note [$0.14; £0.11] with me" Then she realised she did have SOMETHING she could sell after all. ///END of PART 1 ///
"I remembered a shop which WAS USED TO BUYING (être habitué d'acheter ) hair," Prema says, thinking immediately of her own hair. India is one of the WORLD 'S top exporters of human hair, which is sold around the globe to make extensions.
"I went there and sold my entire head of hair FOR 150 rupees ($2; £1.50) The respite was only temporary: Prema knew she was out of options, and her thoughts began to turn towards more drastic measures.
She decided to find a way of COMMITTING SUICIDE She was saved by her sister, who happened to come by IN time ( à temps) to stop her. And then, just A few days later, the help she so desesperately needed appeared out of the blue.
Bala Murugan heard about Prema's situation.
It immediately STRUCK a nerve: her struggle reminded him of his family's darkest hour: at the age of 10, his family ran out ( venir à manquer ok) of food. In a state of utter despair, Bala's mother decided to COMMIT SUICIDE WITH her children. She changed her mind at the last moment: the family rushed their mother to a doctor, and she was saved.
///END of PART 2 /// Bala now lives a life IN a world AWAY from THIS KIND OF situation AND grew up. After years of struggle, he HAS WORKED his way out of poverty and now owns a computer graphics centre. He gave Prema some money to buy food, then wrote about the family on social media.
"Within a day I got 120,000 rupees ($1,670)." At Prema's request, the fundraising was stopped. "She said she would get back to her work and WOULD pay the rest," Prema is slowly getting back on her feet, but, sadly, her financial situation is far from unique. In spite of India's economic growth, millions OF PEOPLE like her struggle to put food on the table.
Prema has another obstacle in her way: she cannot read OR write, like tens of millions of other Indians. As a result, she is unaware of government schemes which provide help to people like her. But thanks to her community and to Bala, she is able to PERCEIVE (percevoir) a way out (une porte de sortie ) of the POVERTY CYCLE which has kept her trapped.
"Now I realise COMMIT suicide was the wrong decision," she says "I am confident about paying back the rest of the loan."/// END of the TEXT ///.
Réponse : Rack your brains and help! /64 de alpiem, postée le 18-02-2020 à 16:36:04 (S | E)
hello,afresh work(pleasure)
READY TO BE CORRECTEDRack your brains and help! /64 20 errors but only 12 found
Prema and her husband had worked in a brick kiln, winning just enough to scrape a living
together for their young family. But they hoped fo more.
Her husband TOOK OUT a loan to start his own kiln, but the plans failed to take up.
In a moment of desperation last year, he killed himself.
The pressure fell solely on Prema not only to earn enough to feed, clothe and house herself
and her three children, but also to pay back the money they OWED for the failed business
venture. And for a while she managed to TAKE her two youngest to WORK with her.
"When I go to work I get 200 rupees per day, which is enough to run our family",But she FELL
ill, which meant she couldn't earn as much. She was sick for three months-by the end of
when the bills had mounted, and the cupboards had run naked.
"My seven-year old son started crying due to HUNGER". Prima had no property, jewellry,for cash
valuables or kitchen ustensils that could be exchanged for cash.
"I didn't even have a 10 rupee-note with me" .Then she realised she did have anything she
could sell after all.
"I remembered a shop which used to buy hair",Prema says,thinkig immediately of her own hair.
India is one of the world 'S top exporters of human hair, which is sold around the globe to
make extentions.
"I went there and sold my entire head of hair FOR 150 rupees.The respite was only temporary:
Prema knew she was out of options, and her thoughts began to turn towards more drastic
measures.
She decided to find a way FOR taking her own life.She was saved by her sister, who happened
to come by on time to stop her.And, just A FEW days later, the help she so desperately
needed appeared out of the blue.
Bala Murugan heard about Prema's situation. HE Immediately stroke a nerve: her struggle
reminded him of his family's darkest hourS: at the age of ten,his family HAD run out of food.
In a state of utter despair, Bala's mother HAD decided to kill herself and her children..
She changed her mind at the last moment: the family rushed her mother to a DOCTOR'S and she
was saved.
Bala now lives a life a world AWAY from the sitution he grew up IN.After years of struggle,
he worked out his way out of poverty and now owns a computer graphic centre.He gave Prema some money
to buy food. Then wrote about the family on social media.
"Within
a day, I got 120,000 rupees."
At Prema's request, the fundraising was stopped.She said she would get back to her work and
pay the rest.Prema is slowly getting back on her feet, but,sadly, her financial situation
is far from unique.
In spite of India's economy growth, millions like her struggle to put food on the table.
Prema has another obstacle ON her way: she cannot read nor write, like tens of millions
of other indians.
As a result she is unaware of government'S schemes which provide help to people like her.
But,thanks to her community and to Bala, she is able to see a way out of the cycle of
poverty which has kept her trapped.
"Now I realise suicide was the wrong decision", she says."I am confident about paying back
the rest of the loan".
Réponse : Rack your brains and help! /64 de maxwell, postée le 19-02-2020 à 15:33:13 (S | E)
READY TO BE CORRECTED
Hello Here4U
Proofreading my try, I've just found 3 basic mistakes worthy of a sixth-grader: you would have killed me literally!
(worst than the preceding exercise...).I hope I've found the major ones, at least!
Prema and her husband had worked in a brick kiln, winning just enough to scrape a living together for their young family. But they had hoped for more. Her husband took OUT a loan to start his own brick kiln, but the plans failed to take OFF. In a moment of desperation last year, he killed himself.
The pressure fell solely on Prema not only to earn enough to feed, clothe and house herself and her three children, but also to pay back the money they HAD BORROWED for the failed business venture. And for a while she managed, taking ALONG her two YOUNGER to GO TO work [(*)]."When I go to work I get 200 rupees ($2.80) per day, which is enough to run our family," But she became ill, which meant she couldn't earn as much. She HAD BEEN sick for three months - by the end of WHICH the bills had mounted, and the cupboards had run BARE. "My SEVEN-YEAR-OLD son started crying due to anger." Prema had no property, jewellery, valuables or kitchen UTENSILS that could be exchanged for cash. "I didn't even have a 10 rupee note [$0.14; £0.11] with me" Then she realised she did have SOMETHING she could sell after all. ///END of PART 1 /// "I remembered a shop which used to buy hair," Prema says, thinking immediately of her own hair. India is one of the world['S] top exporters of human hair, which is sold around the globe to make extensions. "I went there and sold my entire head of hair FOR 150 rupees ($2; £1.50) The respite was only temporary: Prema knew she was RUNNING out of options, and her thoughts began to turn towards more drastic measures. She decided to find a way of taking her own life. She was saved by her sister, who happened to come by IN time to stop her. And then, just A few days later, the help she HAD NEEDED so DESPERATELY appeared out of the blue.
Bala Murugan heard about Prema's situation. It immediately stroke a nerve: her struggle reminded him of his family's darkest HOURS: at the age of 10, his family ran out of food. In a state of utter despair, Bala's mother decided to kill herself and her children. She changed her mind at the last moment: the family rushed their mother to a doctor, and she was saved. ///END of PART 2 /// Bala now lives a life a world AWAY from the situation he grew up IN. After years of struggle, he worked his way out of poverty and now owns a computer graphics centre. He gave Prema some money to buy food, then wrote about the family on THE social media. "Within a day I got 120,000 rupees ($1,670)." At Prema's request, the fundraising was stopped. "She said she would get back to her work and pay the rest," Prema is slowly getting back on her feet, but, sadly, her financial situation is far from unique. In spite of India's economic growth, millions like her struggle to put food on the table. Prema has another obstacle in her way: she CAN NEITHER read nor write, like tens of millions of other Indians. As a result, she is unaware of THE government['S] schemes which provide help to people like her. But thanks to her community and to Bala, she is able to see a way out of the cycle of poverty which has kept her trapped. "Now I realise suicide was the wrong decision," she says. "I am confident about paying back the rest of the loan."/// END of the TEXT ///.
(*) j'ai changé sinon on aurait pu lire qu'elle s'en sortait en faisant travailler ses 2 plus jeunes enfants avec elle...
Réponse : Rack your brains and help! /64 de joe39, postée le 19-02-2020 à 19:36:23 (S | E)
Hello dear here4u,
Please find hereunder my try,
Ready to be corrected
Please help my student who has left 20 mistakes.
Prema and her husband had worked in a brick kiln, EARNING -1 just enough to scrape a living together for their young family. But they had hoped for more. Her husband took OUT -2 a loan to start his own brick kiln, but the plans failed to take OFF -3. In a moment of desperation last year, he killed himself.
The pressure fell solely on Prema not only to earn enough to feed, clothe and house herself and her three children, but also to pay back the money they OWED -4 for the failed business venture. And for a while she managed, taking her two youngest to work with her. "When I go to work I get 200 rupees ($2.80) per day, which is enough to run our family," But she became ill, which meant she couldn't earn as much. She was sick for three months - by the end of WHICH – 5 the bills had mounted, and the cupboards had run EMPTY -6. "My SEVEN-YEAR-OLD- 7 son started crying due to HUNGER -8." Prema had no property, jewellery, valuables or kitchen UTENSILS -9 that could be exchanged for cash. "I didn't even have a 10 rupee note [$0.14; £0.11] with me" Then she realised she did have SOMETHING -10 she could sell after all. ///END of PART 1 ///
"I remembered a shop which used to buy hair," Prema says, thinking immediately of her own hair. India is one of the WORLD’S -11 top exporters of human hair, which is sold around the globe to make extensions. "I went there and sold my entire head of hair FOR -12 150 rupees ($2; £1.50) The respite was only temporary: Prema knew she was out of options, and her thoughts began to turn towards more drastic measures.
She decided to find a way of taking her own life. She was saved by her sister, who happened to come by on time to stop her. And then, just A -13 few days later, the help she so DESPERATELY – 14 needed appeared out of the blue.
Bala Murugan heard about Prema's situation. It immediately STRUCK - 15 a nerve: her struggle reminded him of his family's darkest hour: at the age of 10, his family ran out of food. In a state of utter despair, Bala's mother decided to kill herself and her children. She changed her mind at the last moment: the family rushed their mother to a doctor, and she was saved. ///END of PART 2 ///
Bala now lives a life a world AWAY-16 from the situation he grew up IN -17. After years of struggle, he HAS worked – 18 his way out of poverty and now owns a computer graphics centre. He gave Prema some money to buy food, then wrote about the family on social media. "Within a day I got 120,000 rupees ($1,670)." At Prema's request, the fundraising was stopped. "She said she would get back to her work and pay the rest. NOW – 19 " Prema is slowly getting back on her feet, but, sadly, her financial situation is far from unique. In spite of India's economic growth, millions like her struggle to put food on the table.
Prema has another obstacle in her way: she cannot read OR-20 write, like tens of millions of other Indians. As a result, she is unaware of government schemes which provide help to people like her. But thanks to her community and to Bala, she is able to see a way out of the cycle of poverty which has kept her trapped. "Now I realize suicide was the wrong decision," she says. "I am confident about paying back the rest of the loan."/// END of the TEXT ///.
Thank goodness the story has ended positively, and I thank you for this exercise.
Have a pleasant evening.
So long,
Joe 39
Réponse : Rack your brains and help! /64 de here4u, postée le 23-02-2020 à 20:25:44 (S | E)
Hello!
J'ai effectué les transferts de corrections, mais il me manque encore quelques "fidèles" (en vacances ? )
Come on... I'm expecting your tries...
Réponse : Rack your brains and help! /64 de chocolatcitron, postée le 23-02-2020 à 23:23:35 (S | E)
Rack your brains and help! /64
Message de here4u posté le 12-02-2020 à 21:35:02 (S | E | F) mercredi 26 février
Hello my dear Here4u, thanks !
Je m'engage à traduire la partie qui restera (entre la 2ème et la 3ème partie, puisque Maggie prend déjà la première partie)!Hi Everybody!
Aujourd'hui, il a eu envie de donner une toute petite lueur d'espoir quand tout semble bien difficile ...
MY STUDENT has left 20 mistakes. FINISHED !
Here is my work : the translation is quite difficult, even if the text can be understood quite easily!
Prema and her husband had worked ON a brick kiln, winning just enough to scrape a living together for their young family. But they had hoped for more. Her husband took OUT a loan to start his own brick kiln, but the plans failed to take OFF . In a moment of desperation last year, he killed himself.
The pressure fell solely on Prema TO not only earn enough to feed, clothe and house herself and her three children, but also to pay back the money they OWED for the failed business venture. And for a while she managed, taking her two youngest to work with her."When I go to work I get 200 rupees ($2.80) per day, which is enough to run our family," But she became ill, which meant she couldn't earn as much. She was sick for three months - by the end of WHICH the bills had mounted, and the cupboards had run BARE. "My SEVEN-YEAR-OLD son started crying due to anger." Prema had no property, jewellery, valuables or kitchen ustensils that could be exchanged for cash. "I didn't even have a 10 rupee note [$0.14; £0.11] with me" Then she realised she did have SOMETHING she could sell after all. ///END of PART 1 ///
"I remembered a shop which used to buy hair," Prema says, thinking immediately of her own hair. India is one of the world’S top exporters of human hair, which is sold around the globe to make extensions. "I went there and sold my entire head of hair FOR 150 rupees ($2; £1.50) The respite was only temporary: Prema knew she was out of options, and her thoughts began to turn towards more drastic measures.
She decided to find ANOTHER way of taking her own life. She was saved by her sister, who happened to come by IN time to stop her. And then, just few days later, the help she so desesperately needed appeared out of the blue.
Bala Murugan heard about Prema's situation. It immediately STRUCK a nerve: her struggle reminded him of his family's darkest hour: at the age of 10, his family ran out of food. In a state of utter despair, Bala's mother decided to kill herself and her children. She changed her mind at the last moment: the family rushed their mother to a doctor, and she was saved.
///END of PART 2 ///
Bala now lives a life a world AWAY from the situation he grew up IN. After years of struggle, he HAS worked his way out of poverty and now owns a computer graphics centre. He gave Prema some money to buy food, then wrote about the family on social media.
"Within a day I got 120,000 rupees ($1,670)." At Prema's request, the fundraising was stopped."She said she would get back to her work and pay the rest," Prema is slowly getting back on her feet, but, sadly, her financial situation is far from unique. In spite of India's economic growth, millions like her struggle to put food on the table.
Prema has another obstacle in her way: she cannot read OR write, like tens of millions of other Indians. As a result, she is unaware of government schemes which provide help to people like her. But thanks to her community’S and to Bala’S GENEROSITY, she is able to see a way out of the cycle of poverty which has kept her trapped. "Now I realise suicide was the wrong decision," she says. "I am confident about paying back the rest of the loan."/// END of the TEXT ///.
Here is the force back to you for marking… Here4u, and sending back our copies.
Have a very sweet Week, each of You !
See you soon.
Réponse : Rack your brains and help! /64 de maxwell, postée le 26-02-2020 à 19:56:09 (S | E)
Hello!
Ah oui j'ai oublié de préciser : je prendrai la 3e partie du follow-up
Réponse : Rack your brains and help! /64 de here4u, postée le 26-02-2020 à 23:27:45 (S | E)
Dear Friends and proofreaders,
Thank you for the HELP you've given my Student…
Vous avez, dans l’ensemble, bien trouvé les « fautes » oubliées … Vous avez reconnu les « grands classiques » (adjectif composé/ temps du passé/ comparatifs vs superlatifs/ …) Vous devez encore faire très attention aux particules adverbiales (leur choix, leur place), et aux prépositions que vous avez encore tendance à mélanger …
Notre sujet était délicat … et comme il comportait le mot « suicide », reconnu par «The Machine», à chaque fois que je vous ai envoyé une correction, j’ai reçu le message de notre site pour tenter de venir en aide aux personnes qui seraient tentées par ces mesures extrêmes …
N’hésitez pas à noter les numéros pour pouvoir également les communiquer à un entourage qui en aurait besoin ! MERCI à tous ! Si vous avez besoin de parler à quelqu'un de manière anonyme, voici plusieurs numéros d'écoute :
Suicide Ecoute
01 45 39 40 00
Sos Suicide Phénix
01 40 44 46 45 (de midi à minuit)
0825 120 364 (de 16h à 23h)
Cap Ecoute
Numéro National : 04 72 33 34 35
En cas d'urgence médicale :
SAMU : 15
Police : 17
Pompiers : 18
Urgences depuis un téléphone mobile : 112
Suivez ces conseils de spécialistes :
Sortez un petit moment :
Allez vous promener, courir ou faire du vélo.
Allez au cinéma.
Visitez de nouveaux lieux, comme un café, un musée ou un parc où vous n’êtes jamais allé.
Faites appel à votre créativité :
Dessinez quelque chose de simple.
Dégustez un bon repas.
Écrivez une nouvelle.
Apaisez vos sens :
Faites de la méditation ou du yoga.
Prenez une douche chaude.
Écoutez vos chansons préférées.
Détendez-vous :
Contemplez les nuages.
Lisez un livre, un magazine ou un blog.
Faites une sieste.
Dès maintenant, contactez quelqu’un en qui vous avez confiance, comme un membre de votre famille, un ami, un thérapeute, un professionnel ou un professeur, et demandez à lui parler de ce qui vous préoccupe.
Prema and her husband had worked in a brick kiln, making (1) just enough to scrape a living together for their young family. But they had hoped for more. Her husband took out a loan (2) to start his own brick kiln, but the plans failed to take off.(3) In a moment of desperation last year, he killed himself.
The pressure fell solely on Prema not only to earn enough to feed, clothe and house herself and her three children, but also to pay back the money they owed for (4) the failed business venture. And for a while she managed, taking her two youngest to work with her."When I go to work I get 200 rupees ($2.80) per day, which is enough to run our family," But she became ill, which meant she couldn't earn as much. She was sick for three months - by the end of which (5) the bills had mounted, and the cupboards had run bare.(6) "My seven-year-old son (7) started crying due to hunger (8)." Prema had no property, jewellery, valuables or kitchen utensils (9) that could be exchanged for cash. "I didn't even have a 10 rupee note [$0.14; £0.11] with me" Then she realised she did have something (10) she could sell after all." /// END of PART 1 /// I remembered a shop which used to buy hair," Prema says, thinking immediately of her own hair. India is one of the world's top exporters (11) of human hair, which is sold around the globe to make extensions. "I went there and sold my entire head of hair for (12) 150 rupees ($2; £1.50)." It might not sound like a lot - "I got three packs of cooked rice, each costing 20 rupees, for my three children," she says. But the respite was only temporary: Prema knew she was out of options, and her thoughts began to turn towards more drastic measures. She decided to find a way of taking her own life. She was saved by her sister, who happened to come by in time (13) to stop her. And then, just a few days later (14), the help she so desperately (15) needed appeared out of the blue.
Bala Murugan heard about Prema's situation. It immediately struck (16) a nerve: her struggle reminded him of his family's darkest hour: at the age of 10, his family ran out of food. In a state of utter despair, Bala's mother decided to kill herself and her children. She changed her mind at the last moment: the family rushed their mother to a doctor, and she was saved. /// END of PART 2 /// Bala now lives a life a world away(17) from the situation he grew up in (18). After years of struggle, he has worked (19) his way out of poverty and now owns a computer graphics centre. He gave Prema some money to buy food. Then Bala wrote about the family on social media. "Within a day I got 120,000 rupees ($1,670). At Prema's request, the fundraising was stopped. "She said she would get back to her work and pay the rest." Prema is slowly getting back on her feet, but, sadly, her financial situation is far from unique. In spite of India's economic growth, millions like her struggle to put food on the table. Prema has another obstacle in her way: she cannot read or write (20), like tens of millions of other Indians. As a result, she is unaware of government’S schemes which provide help to people like her. But thanks to her community and to Bala, she is able to see a way out of the cycle of poverty which has kept her trapped. "Now I realise suicide was the wrong decision," she says. "I am confident about paying back the rest of the loan." /// END of the TEXT ///.
D’abord, une expression qui vous a gênés : to kill oneself/ to take one’s life/ to commit suicide; les trois expressions employées dans le texte étaient justes ; donc, il ne faut pas corriger l’une par l’autre sauf si le contexte (psychologique, ou un jugement "moral" par exemple) l’exige.
(1) To MAKE money= to EARN money, c’est-à-dire « gagner de l’argent » au sens de mériter son argent. To WIN signifie aussi gagner, mais par hasard, un jeu ou une loterie
, par exemple. (2) To take out a loan= prendre, contracter un emprunt.
(3) To take off= décoller dans tous les sens du terme.
(4) TO OWE money= devoir de l’argent, au sens d’avoir des dettes ; «IOU= I owe you» est une « reconnaissance de dette ».
(5) for three months - by the end of which= by the end of the three months.
(6) To run bare= to be empty; bare= naked= without any clothes on. The cupboards had run bare= were empty of any stored groceries.
(7) My seven-year-old son= le nom «year» est en position d’adjectif et reste donc invariable.
(8) to cry of hunger. Le petit garçon avait très faim. Il pourrait aussi être en colère, mais son problème est différent ici. Hunger /// Anger
(9) a utensil: attention au calque de l’orthographe par rapport au français (pas de –s).
(10) she did have something= elle avait quelque chose. Anything = n’importe quoi.
(11) the world's top exporters: le cas possessif était nécessaire.
(12) to sell for money= vendre pour la somme de …
(13) to come by= passer par hasard ; Lien internet
Difference between «in time» and «on time» : Lien internet
(14) just a few days later= quelques jours plus tard // just few days later= peu/ trop peu de jours après.
(15) desperate/ desperately
(16) It immediately struck: to strike, I struck, struck. Ne pas confondre avec to stroke= caresser.
(17) a world away= far from
(18) from the situation he grew up in. Rejet de la particule adverbiale en fin de proposition (ou après le verbe).
(19) After years of struggle, he has worked his way out of poverty= present perfect de bilan d’action.
(20) she cannot read or write= BON ! (et la correction est minimale … ça fait « plaisir à mon élève ! »
Inutile donc de changer la stucture en retirant la négation du groupe verbal : she can neither read nor write. Ce n’est pas meilleur (sauf dans le cadre d’un potentiel exercice sur «neither…nor» !) que l’original … Revenons au « Follow-up work ! J’ai mes volontaires pour les traductions (MERCI !
) Si d’autres volontaires veulent aussi « s’y coller », n’hésitez pas : je corrigerai sur Forum. Vous avez le temps … Merci à tous et BRAVO pour votre excellent travail.
Réponse : Rack your brains and help! /64 de magie8, postée le 27-02-2020 à 11:37:16 (S | E)
BONJOUR voici la traduction de la 1ére partie
merci à here4u pour la correction j'ai relevé que lotterie était écrit avec 2 t en français je n'ai jamais vu écrit ce mot en français avec 2 t mais un seul et en anglais 2t mais pas ie à la fin mais y lottery: est-ce QUE LOTTERIE est correct maintenant ?
Prema and her husband had worked in a brick kiln, making (1) just enough to scrape a living together for their young family. But they had hoped for more. Her husband took out a loan (2) to start his own brick kiln, but the plans failed to take off.(3) In a moment of desperation last year, he killed himself.
The pressure fell solely on Prema not only to earn enough to feed, clothe and house herself and her three children, but also to pay back the money they owed for (4) the failed business venture. And for a while she managed, taking her two youngest to work with her."When I go to work I get 200 rupees ($2.80) per day, which is enough to run our family," But she became ill, which meant she couldn't earn as much. She was sick for three months - by the end of which (5) the bills had mounted, and the cupboards had run bare.(6) "My seven-year-old son (7) started crying due to hunger (8)." Prema had no property, jewellery, valuables or kitchen utensils (9) that could be exchanged for cash. "I didn't even have a 10 rupee note [$0.14; £0.11] with me" Then she realised she did have something (10) she could sell after all." /// END of PART
Prema et son mari avaient travaillé dans un four à briques gagnant juste assez pour racler de quoi vivre ensemble avec leur jeune famille.Mais ils avaient espéré mieux .Son mari avaient pris un emprunt pour démarrer son propre four à briques mais l'affaire n'avait pas décollée.Dans un moment de désespoir l'année dernière il s'est suicidé.
La pression retombait uniquement sur Prema pas seulement pour gagner suffisamment afin de nourrir, vétir et se loger avec ses trois enfants mais aussi pour rembourser l'argent qu'ils devaient à cause de l'entreprise à risques qui avait échouée.Pendant un temps, elle s'en est sortie en prenant ses deux plus jeunes enfants pour travailler avec elle. "Quand je vais travailler je gagne 200 roupies "2,80 dollars)par jour,ce qui est suffisant pour entretenir la famille.Mais elle tomba malade,ce qui signifiait qu'elle ne pouvait plus gagner autant.Elle fut souffrante pendant trois mois,à l'issue desquels les factures s'étaient accumulées et les placards étaient vides.
"Mon fils de 7 ans commença à pleurer à cause de la faim".Prema n'avait pas de biens,de bijoux,d'objets de valeur ou d'ustensiles de cuisine qui pouvaient être échangés contre de l'argent liquide.
"Je n'avais même pas un billet de 10 roupies"0.14dollars;0.11 livres) avec moi"Puis elle se rendit compte qu'elle avait quelque chose qu'elle pourrait vendre après tout.
Réponse : Rack your brains and help! /64 de here4u, postée le 27-02-2020 à 12:53:38 (S | E)
Hello!
Magie ! Mon correcteur orthographique est réglé sur l'anglais ...
Désolée ! Réponse : Rack your brains and help! /64 de chocolatcitron, postée le 27-02-2020 à 14:22:55 (S | E)
Hello my dear Here4u, thanks for your synthesis work!
Hi Everybody!
FINISHED.
Here is my translation for the second part: je saisis cette chance pour moi de progresser en version, puisque Maggie a déjà travaillé la première partie, et que Maxwell prend la troisième partie. Merci à vous deux, de participer une fois de plus, comme seuls volontaires pour ce "follow up work"!
Dommage pour les autres membres qui n'osent pas se lancer.
I remembered a shop which used to buy hair," Prema says, thinking immediately of her own hair. India is one of the world's top exporters (11) of human hair, which is sold around the globe to make extensions. "I went there and sold my entire head of hair for (12) 150 rupees ($2; £1.50)." It might not sound like a lot - "I got three packs of cooked rice, each costing 20 rupees, for my three children," she says. But the respite was only temporary: Prema knew she was out of options, and her thoughts began to turn towards more drastic measures. She decided to find a way of taking her own life. She was saved by her sister, who happened to come by in time (13) to stop her. And then, just a few days later (14), the help she so desperately (15) needed appeared out of the blue.
Bala Murugan heard about Prema's situation. It immediately struck (16) a nerve: her struggle reminded him of his family's darkest hour: at the age of 10, his family ran out of food. In a state of utter despair, Bala's mother decided to kill herself and her children. She changed her mind at the last moment: the family rushed their mother to a doctor, and she was saved. /// END of PART 2 ///
Je me suis souvenu qu’un magasin achetait des cheveux », dit Prema en pensant immédiatement à ses propres cheveux. L’Inde est l’un des premiers exportateurs mondiaux de cheveux humains, qui sont vendus dans le monde entier pour faire des extensions. «J’y suis allée et j’ai vendu toute ma chevelure pour la somme de 150 roupies (2 $; 1,50 £). « Cela ne semble peut-être pas beaucoup - « J’ai eu trois paquets de riz cuit, chacun coûtant 20 roupies, pour mes trois enfants », dit-elle. Mais le répit ne fut que temporaire : Prema savait qu'elle n'avait plus d'options, et elle envisagea de prendre des mesures plus drastiques. Elle décida de trouver un moyen pour se suicider. Elle fut sauvée par sa sœur qui est venue à temps pour l'arrêter. Et puis, juste quelques jours plus tard, l'aide dont elle avait si désespérément besoin est arrivée à l'improviste.
Bala Murugan a entendu parler de la situation de Prema. Cela a fait tilt : sa lutte lui rappela l'histoire de sa famille dans ses heures les plus sombres : à l'âge de dix ans, sa famille a manqué de nourriture. Dans un état de désespoir total, la mère de Bala avait décidé de tuer ses enfants et de se suicider. Elle changea d'avis au dernier moment : la famille l'envoya en urgence * chez un docteur, et elle fut sauvée./// END of PART 2 ///
La précipita chez un médecin… Le mot "précipiter" donne une image vraiment négative à la scène décrite, comme si elle tombait dans le néant. J'espère être restée fidèle à ce texte bouleversant, car il renvoie à l'histoire de très nombreuses familles.
Have a very very sweet Week!
See you soon.
Réponse : Rack your brains and help! /64 de here4u, postée le 27-02-2020 à 16:54:17 (S | E)
Hello, Dear Friends!
Voici le début de la correction du Follow-up work... Anyone can step in for any part...
Prema and her husband had worked in a brick kiln, making just enough to scrape a living together for their young family. But they had hoped for more. Her husband took out a loan to start his own brick kiln, but the plans failed to take off. In a moment of desperation last year, he killed himself.
The pressure fell solely on Prema not only to earn enough to feed, clothe and house herself and her three children, but also to pay back the money they owed for the failed business venture. And for a while she managed, taking her two youngest to work with her."When I go to work I get 200 rupees ($2.80) per day, which is enough to run our family," But she became ill, which meant she couldn't earn as much. She was sick for three months - by the end of which the bills had mounted, and the cupboards had run bare. "My seven-year-old son started crying due to hunger." Prema had no property, jewellery, valuables or kitchen utensils that could be exchanged for cash. "I didn't even have a 10 rupee note [$0.14; £0.11] with me" Then she realised she did have something she could sell after all."
Prema et son mari avaient travaillé dans * une fabrique de briques gagnant juste assez pour joindre les deux bouts pour leur jeune famille. Mais ils avaient espéré mieux. Son mari avait pris un emprunt pour démarrer son propre four à briques mais l'affaire n'avait pas décollé. Dans un moment de désespoir l'année dernière, il s'est suicidé.
La pression retombait uniquement sur Prema non seulement pour gagner suffisamment afin se de nourrir, se vêtir et se loger avec ses trois enfants, mais aussi pour rembourser l'argent qu'ils devaient à cause de l'échec de leur jeune entreprise. Pendant un temps, elle s'en est sortie en emmenant ses deux plus jeunes enfants au travail avec elle. "Quand je vais travailler je gagne 200 roupies (2,80 dollars) par jour, ce qui est suffisant pour entretenir la famille." Mais elle tomba malade, ce qui signifiait qu'elle ne pouvait plus gagner autant. Elle fut souffrante pendant trois mois, à l'issue desquels les factures s'étaient accumulées et les placards étaient vides.
" Mon fils de 7 ans se mit à pleurer de faim". Prema n'avait pas de biens, de bijoux, d'objets de valeur ou d'ustensiles de cuisine qui pouvaient être échangés contre de l'argent liquide.
"Je n'avais même pas un billet de 10 roupies [0,14dollars; 0,11 livres] avec moi" Puis elle se rendit compte qu'elle avait vraiment quelque chose à vendre après tout.
Merci, et BRAVO Magie, pour ce très bon travail.
* Lien internet
**Lien internet
= aussi "to make ends meet".
I remembered a shop which used to buy hair," Prema says, thinking immediately of her own hair. India is one of the world's top exporters of human hair, which is sold around the globe to make extensions. "I went there and sold my entire head of hair for 150 rupees ($2; £1.50)."It might not sound like a lot - "I got three packs of cooked rice, each costing 20 rupees, for my three children," she says. But the respite was only temporary: Prema knew she was out of options, and her thoughts began to turn towards more drastic measures. She decided to find a way of taking her own life. She was saved by her sister, who happened to come by in time to stop her. And then, just a few days later, the help she so desperately needed appeared out of the blue.
Bala Murugan heard about Prema's situation. It immediately struck a nerve: her struggle reminded him of his family's darkest hour: at the age of 10, his family ran out of food. In a state of utter despair, Bala's mother decided to kill herself and her children. She changed her mind at the last moment: the family rushed their mother to a doctor, and she was saved.
" Je me suis souvenue qu’un magasin achetait des cheveux ", dit Prema, en pensant immédiatement à ses propres cheveux. L’Inde est l’un des premiers exportateurs mondiaux de cheveux humains, qui sont vendus dans le monde entier pour faire des extensions. « J’y suis allée et j’ai vendu toute ma chevelure pour la somme de 150 roupies (2 $; 1,50 £). « Cela ne semble peut-être pas beaucoup - « J’ai eu trois paquets de riz cuit, chacun coûtant 20 roupies, pour mes trois enfants », dit-elle. Mais le répit ne fut que temporaire : Prema savait qu'elle n'avait plus d'options, et elle envisagea de prendre des mesures plus drastiques. Elle décida de trouver un moyen de se suicider. Elle fut sauvée par sa sœur qui par hasard *, arriva à temps pour l'arrêter. Et puis, juste quelques jours plus tard, l'aide dont elle avait si désespérément besoin est arrivée à l'improviste.
Bala Murugan a entendu parler de la situation de Prema. Cela a fait tilt
: sa lutte lui rappela l'histoire de sa famille dans ses heures les plus sombres : à l'âge de dix ans, sa famille a manqué de nourriture. Dans un état de désespoir total, la mère de Bala se décida de tuer ses enfants et de se suicider. Elle changea d'avis au dernier moment : sa famille l'emmena consulter en urgence *, et elle fut sauvée.Merci, et BRAVO Choco, pour ce très bon travail.
* happen to do [sth] vi + prep (chance to) (dans questions surtout) par hasard adv
(dans affirmations) justement adv
(dans affirmations) il se trouve que + [indicatif] loc v (wordreference.com)
Bala now lives a life a world away(17) from the situation he grew up in. After years of struggle, he has worked his way out of poverty and now owns a computer graphics centre. He gave Prema some money to buy food. Then Bala wrote about the family on social media. "Within a day I got 120,000 rupees ($1,670). At Prema's request, the fundraising was stopped. "She said she would get back to her work and pay the rest." Prema is slowly getting back on her feet, but, sadly, her financial situation is far from unique. In spite of India's economic growth, millions like her struggle to put food on the table. Prema has another obstacle in her way: she cannot read or write (20), like tens of millions of other Indians. As a result, she is unaware of government’S schemes which provide help to people like her. But thanks to her community and to Bala, she is able to see a way out of the cycle of poverty which has kept her trapped. "Now I realise suicide was the wrong decision," she says. "I am confident about paying back the rest of the loan."
Bala mène à présent une vie à mille lieues de la situation dans laquelle il a grandi. Après des années de lutte, il a réussi, par le travail * à se sortir de la pauvreté et possède maintenant un centre d'infographie. Il a donné à Prema de l'argent pour acheter de la nourriture. Puis il a écrit au sujet de la famille dans les réseaux sociaux. "En une journée, j'ai obtenu 120 000 roupies (1 670 $). A la demande de Prema, la collecte de fonds fut arrêtée. "Elle a dit qu'elle retournerait travailler et paierait le reste." Prema se remit progressivement sur pied mais, malheureusement, sa situation financière est loin d'être unique. Malgré la croissance économique de l'Inde, des millions de personnes comme elle se battent pour subvenir aux besoins alimentaires familiaux. Prema a un autre obstacle sur son chemin : elle ne sait ni lire ni écrire comme des dizaines de millions d'autres indiens. Par conséquent, elle n'a pas connaissance des plans du gouvernement qui fournissent de l'aide à des gens comme elle. Mais grâce à sa communauté et à Bala, elle peut entrevoir un moyen de sortir du cycle de la pauvreté qui la maintenait prisonnière.
"Maintenant, je me rends compte que le suicide n'était pas la bonne décision" dit-elle. "Je suis sûre de pouvoir rembourser le reste du prêt".Merci, et BRAVO Maxwell, pour ce très bon travail.
* une résultative que vous aimez tant !
Un grand MERCI à nos volontaires de la part de tous ...
Réponse : Rack your brains and help! /64 de maxwell, postée le 27-02-2020 à 21:00:35 (S | E)
Hello! Here's part III:
FINISHED
Bala now lives a life a world away from the situation he grew up in. After years of struggle, he has worked his way out of poverty and now owns a computer graphics centre. He gave Prema some money to buy food. Then Bala wrote about the family on social media. "Within a day I got 120,000 rupees ($1,670). At Prema's request, the fundraising was stopped. "She said she would get back to her work and pay the rest." Prema is slowly getting back on her feet, but, sadly, her financial situation is far from unique. In spite of India's economic growth, millions like her struggle to put food on the table. Prema has another obstacle in her way: she cannot read or write, like tens of millions of other Indians. As a result, she is unaware of government’S schemes which provide help to people like her. But thanks to her community and to Bala, she is able to see a way out of the cycle of poverty which has kept her trapped. "Now I realise suicide was the wrong decision," she says. "I am confident about paying back the rest of the loan."
Bala mène à présent une vie à mille lieues de la situation dans laquelle il a grandi. Après des années de lutte, il a réussi à se sortir de la pauvreté et possède maintenant un centre d'infographie. Il a donné à Prema de l'argent pour acheter de la nourriture. Puis il a écrit au sujet de la famille dans les réseaux sociaux. "En une journée, j'ai obtenu 120 000 roupies (1 670 $). A la demande de Prema, la collecte de fonds fut arrêtée. "Elle a dit qu'elle retournerait travailler et paierait le reste." Prema se remet progressivement sur pied mais, malheureusement, sa situation financière est loin d'être unique. Malgré la croissance économique de l'Inde, des millions de personnes comme elle se battent pour subvenir aux besoins alimentaires. Prema a un autre obstacle sur son chemin : elle ne sait ni lire ni écrire comme des dizaines de millions d'autres indiens. Par conséquent, elle n'a pas connaissance des plans du gouvernement qui fournissent de l'aide à des gens comme elle. Mais grâce à sa communauté et à Bala, elle peut entrevoir un moyen de sortir du cycle de la pauvreté qui la maintenait prisonnière. "Maintenant, je me rends compte que le suicide n'était pas la bonne décision" dit-elle. "Je suis sûre de pouvoir rembourser le reste du prêt".
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