Expression écrite/aide
Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En basMessage de bbj17 posté le 03-01-2019 à 10:37:42 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
je suis actuellement en classe de Terminale S et j'ai une expression écrite à réaliser sur le sujet : Should Parents Interfere With their children's choices or decision?
Merci de bien vouloir corriger mon texte.
En vous souhaitant une bonne année.
Generally, parents have to intervene in the choices of their kids to help them or to give an opinion. But as the child grows up, parents are less and less likely to decide on their children's choices. We will answer the following question: Should parents interfere with their children's choices? First, we will see the benefits that parents have to share in the decisions of their children. Then we study the disadvantages
First, the parents are adults, which means that they are responsible and therefore have some experience. As a result, they will be able to show their children the right path, be it studies, the first job, the purchase of the first apartment ... They help their children make decisions. For example, parents will buy their child's first t-shirt and when they grow up they will buy their own t-shirt. For parents, the primary goal for their child is for him to succeed in his life. They want the best for their children and want to be proud of them by making the right choices.
However, some parents have negative attitudes towards their children, so it is sometimes better for them to make their own decisions. At times, parents may be overly involved in their children's decisions, which can lead to a blockage of their parents, even to the point of conflict. It can start with "insignificant" things, such as a way of dressing, of behaving to the child's own future. The causes are multiple, the choices of the children can be different from this parents because they are not the same age. One of the most serious consequences may be that if parents choose too much instead of children, young people will never know about them and can not make any choice.
To conclude, I would say that it is important for children to listen to parents' advice so that it does not fail in their lives, especially when the child is hesitant. However, the child must have the last word for decision-making and not according to parents' preferences.
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Modifié par lucile83 le 03-01-2019 13:17
Réponse : Expression écrite/aide de gerondif, postée le 03-01-2019 à 12:12:54 (S | E)
Bonjour
Vous passez souvent du singulier au pluriel kids, child, children, il faudrait harmoniser.
Generally, parents have to intervene in the choices of their kids (un peu familier) to help them or to give an opinion. But as the child grows up, parents are less and less likely to decide on their children's choices. We will answer the following question: Should parents interfere with their children's choices? First, we will see the benefits that parents have to share in the decisions of their children. Then we (futur)study the disadvantages
First, the parents are adults, which means that they are responsible and therefore have some experience. As a result, they will be able to show their children the right path, be it studies, the first job, the purchase of the first apartment ... They help their children make decisions. For example, parents will buy their child's first t-shirt and when they grow up they will buy their own t-shirt(pluriel). For parents, the primary goal for their child is for him to succeed in (his) life. They want the best for their children and want to be proud of them by making the right choices.
However, some parents have negative attitudes towards their children, so it is sometimes better for them (for those children serait plus clair) to make their own decisions. At times, parents may be overly involved in their children's decisions, which can lead to a blockage of their parents ( pas clair, il faudrait dire which can result in a rejection of their parents by the children / which can entail thier being rejected by their children), even to the point of conflict. It can start with "insignificant" things, such as a way of dressing, of behaving to the child's own future (maladroit, ce the child's si le child en question est sujet du verbe). The causes are multiple, the choices of the children can be different from this parents(bizarre, cette erreur this à la place de his ou their, c'est comme si vous aviez écrit "de ces parents" ???) because they are not the same age. One of the most serious consequences may be that if parents choose too much instead of children, young people will never know about them and can not (n'existe pas en deux mots . cannot) make any choice.
To conclude, I would say that it is important for children to listen to parents' advice so that it does not fail in their lives,(sens ??) especially when the child is hesitant. However, the child must have the last word for decision-making and not according to(mal employé) parents' preferences.
Réponse : Expression écrite/aide de bbj17, postée le 03-01-2019 à 18:44:04 (S | E)
Generally, parents have to intervene in the choices of their children to help them or to give an opinion. But as the children grows up, parents are less and less likely to decide on their children's choices. We will answer the following question: Should parents interfere with their children's choices? First, we will see the benefits that parents have to share in the decisions of their children. Then we will study the disadvantages.
First, the parents are adults, which means that they are responsible and therefore have some experience. As a result, they will be able to show their children the right path, be it studies, the first job, the purchase of the first apartment ... They help their children make decisions. For example, parents will buy their children's first t-shirt and when they grow up they will buy their own t-shirts. For parents, the primary goal for their children is for him to succeed in life. They want the best for their children and want to be proud of them by making the right choices.
However, some parents have negative attitudes towards their children, so it is sometimes better for those children to make their own decisions. At times, parents may be overly involved in their children's decisions, which can lead which can result in a rejection of their parents by the children, even to the point of conflict. It can start with "insignificant" things, such as a way of dressing, of behaving to the child own future. The causes are multiple, the choices of the children can be different from his parents because they are not the same age. One of the most serious consequences may be that if parents choose too much instead of children, young people will never know about them and cannot make any choice.
To conclude, I would say that it is important for children to listen to parents' advice so that they succeed in their lives, especially when the child is hesitant. However, the child must have the final say in making decisions and not be based on parental preferences.
Réponse : Expression écrite/aide de gerondif, postée le 03-01-2019 à 19:46:03 (S | E)
Si vous passez vos children au pluriel, passez aussi vos possessifs et vos verbes.
Generally, parents have to intervene in the choices of their children to help them or to give an opinion. But as the children grows up, parents are less and less likely to decide on their children's choices. We will answer the following question: Should parents interfere with their children's choices? First, we will see the benefits that parents have to share in the decisions of their children. Then we will study the disadvantages.
First, the parents are adults, which means that they are responsible and therefore have some experience. As a result, they will be able to show their children the right path, be it studies, the first job, the purchase of the first apartment ... They help their children make decisions. For example, parents will buy their children's first t-shirt and when they grow up they will buy their own t-shirts. For parents, the primary goal for their children is for him to succeed in life. They want the best for their children and want to be proud of them by making the right choices.
However, some parents have negative attitudes towards their children, so it is sometimes better for those children to make their own decisions. At times, parents may be overly involved in their children's decisions, which can lead which can result(c'était l'un ou l'autre!!!) in a rejection of their parents by the children, even to the point of conflict. It can start with "insignificant" things, such as a way of dressing, of behaving to the child own future.(pas clair !) The causes are multiple, the choices of the children can be different from his parents' because they are not the same age. One of the most serious consequences may be that if parents choose(j'aurais plutôt dit "decide") too much instead of children, young people will never know about them(pas clair? ne sauront rien sur eux, ne sauront rien des parents ? ne sauront rien des choix, des problèmes, des difficultés ?) and cannot make any choice.
To conclude, I would say that it is important for children to listen to parents' advice so that they succeed in their lives, especially when the child is hesitant. However, the child must have the final say in making decisions and not be based(cette expression s'applique aux décisions, pas à l'enfant lui même, c'est bancal!) on parental preferences.
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