Correction/ Myths and Heroes
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Message de urbanzak posté le 14-11-2017 à 11:52:24 (S | E | F)
Bonjour
Je suis en train de préparer mon devoir; pouvez-vous me dire si c'est correct ou pas afin que je puisse le corriger ?
Je vous en remercie.
The notion talks about myths and heroes, a myth is a story often about gods which explains the origins of nations, communities. It also means a story which is not true, an illusion. The central caracters of myths are heroes, extraordinary people. I will talk about the american dream with differents documents who talks about this description, people who fulfil it and his limits. Is the myth of the american dream a reality ? What are the limits of the american dream ? first I will talk about the definition of the american dream and what it represents for people. Then I will explain how it can be a reality. Finally I will talk about its limits.
The americain dream is a myth in which people believed if they live their country to go to america and if they work hard they can have a better life for them and their children, with a house, a car, a lot of money, they can be respected because of their work People live their country by ship, the view of the statue of liberty represent the begining of a new life more illuminated. Immigrants who come in america could be younger without their parents or they could be with their family.
A lot of people had fulfil the american dream like Andrew Carnegie who arrive in america when he was young with his parents and he works hard during his life and now his is a millionaire He is a self made man and an example for others people, he american dream can be fulfil for everyone. Today a lot of peolple cannot be fulfil the american dream because they do not live in the good states. For example people who live in Washington can be rich and earn more than their parents.
In america there are a lot of people who cannot fulfil the american dream because they do not believe in this, they work hard and for a majority of them they earn less than their parents Others had seen their parents work a lot and they have any advantages. More of that they are a wall between the uited stated and mexico so a lot of people cannot be arrived in the united states they did not can have a better life or fulfil their dream.
To conclude nowadays, the american dream cannot be a reality for everyone because they cannot pass the wll or they can died if they try. But this dream can be fulfil for a lot of people if they believe in.
Je vous remercie pour l'aide que vous pourrez m'apporter
Bonne journée
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Modifié par lucile83 le 14-11-2017 12:25
Message de urbanzak posté le 14-11-2017 à 11:52:24 (S | E | F)
Bonjour
Je suis en train de préparer mon devoir; pouvez-vous me dire si c'est correct ou pas afin que je puisse le corriger ?
Je vous en remercie.
The notion talks about myths and heroes, a myth is a story often about gods which explains the origins of nations, communities. It also means a story which is not true, an illusion. The central caracters of myths are heroes, extraordinary people. I will talk about the american dream with differents documents who talks about this description, people who fulfil it and his limits. Is the myth of the american dream a reality ? What are the limits of the american dream ? first I will talk about the definition of the american dream and what it represents for people. Then I will explain how it can be a reality. Finally I will talk about its limits.
The americain dream is a myth in which people believed if they live their country to go to america and if they work hard they can have a better life for them and their children, with a house, a car, a lot of money, they can be respected because of their work People live their country by ship, the view of the statue of liberty represent the begining of a new life more illuminated. Immigrants who come in america could be younger without their parents or they could be with their family.
A lot of people had fulfil the american dream like Andrew Carnegie who arrive in america when he was young with his parents and he works hard during his life and now his is a millionaire He is a self made man and an example for others people, he american dream can be fulfil for everyone. Today a lot of peolple cannot be fulfil the american dream because they do not live in the good states. For example people who live in Washington can be rich and earn more than their parents.
In america there are a lot of people who cannot fulfil the american dream because they do not believe in this, they work hard and for a majority of them they earn less than their parents Others had seen their parents work a lot and they have any advantages. More of that they are a wall between the uited stated and mexico so a lot of people cannot be arrived in the united states they did not can have a better life or fulfil their dream.
To conclude nowadays, the american dream cannot be a reality for everyone because they cannot pass the wll or they can died if they try. But this dream can be fulfil for a lot of people if they believe in.
Je vous remercie pour l'aide que vous pourrez m'apporter
Bonne journée
-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 14-11-2017 12:25
Réponse : Correction/ Myths and Heroes de laure95, postée le 14-11-2017 à 14:12:37 (S | E)
Bonjour,
- The notion talks (une notion "ne parle pas", construit avec le verbe TO DEAL = traiter de)about myths and heroes,
- caracters: orthographe.
- american: majuscule.
- differents (pas de "s" aux adjectifs!)documents who (pas le bon relatif)talks (pas le bon verbe ici)about this description, people who fulfil it and his (pas le bon possessif)limits.
- first: majuscule.
- Then (virgule)I will explain how it can be a reality. Finally (virgule) I will talk about its limits.
- The americain
- a myth in which people believed (présent)if they live (live = habiter pas quitter)their country to go to america (majuscule)
- People live their country
- the view of the statue of liberty represent: faute de conjugaison.
- the begining of a new life more illuminated: ?
- (article) Immigrants who come in america could be younger
without their parents - A lot of people had fulfil: conjugaison.
- the american dream like Andrew Carnegie who arrive (passé) in america (majuscule)when he was young
- and he works (passé)hard during his life and now (il est mort!) his (pas le bon mot)is (passé)a millionaire He is (passé)a self made man and an example for others (singulier) people,
- he american dream can be fulfil for everyone: ?
- Today a lot of peolple cannot be fulfil the american dream: ?
- because they do not live in the good states: ?
- In america: majuscule.
- tOthers had seen: mettre au présent perfect.
- they have any advantages: any se met dans une phrase négative.
- More of that: ?
- they are a wall: ?
- the uited stated
- mexico: majuscule.
- so a lot of people cannot be arrived : can + infinitif.
- the united states: majuscule à tous les mots.
- they did not can have a better life: ?
- the wll
- they can died: can + infinitif.
- But this dream can be fulfil: can + be + participe passé.
Réponse : Correction/ Myths and Heroes de urbanzak, postée le 14-11-2017 à 14:46:46 (S | E)
Merci beaucoup pour la correction Bonne journée
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