Correction/graduation
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Message de lena000 posté le 30-10-2017 à 17:26:25 (S | E | F)
Bonjour à tous ,
je voulais savoir si c'était possible de corriger mon texte ,
merci d'avance
Hello everybody, my name is Tania and today it is a very special day because it is the graduation ceremony. I have to tell you that I am extremely satisfied and proud of me because that was not still easy for me, I come from a country which knew the war. For those who do not know it I am of Syrian origin, I came in America when I was 12 years old , I would always remember the hardships I had to go through to get here. I could not grow up like other children, I lived in war, fear and death, it was a horrible moment , I lost my mother by coming here. America for me was the best thing that could happen to me, here I was able to grow up without fear of any noise, I could never thank this country, it allowed me to escape death , thanks to this country i've had a normal adolescence, grow up and go to school, something I could never have done in Syria. A lot of people dreams about it , maybe you do not realize , but we have an incredible luck this country has given me incredible benefits, I have learned so much from here
I am so proud to have become an American citizen , I cannot say that thank you for everthing , to have offered me a better life and a future.
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Modifié par lucile83 le 30-10-2017 18:31
Message de lena000 posté le 30-10-2017 à 17:26:25 (S | E | F)
Bonjour à tous ,
je voulais savoir si c'était possible de corriger mon texte ,
merci d'avance
Hello everybody, my name is Tania and today it is a very special day because it is the graduation ceremony. I have to tell you that I am extremely satisfied and proud of me because that was not still easy for me, I come from a country which knew the war. For those who do not know it I am of Syrian origin, I came in America when I was 12 years old , I would always remember the hardships I had to go through to get here. I could not grow up like other children, I lived in war, fear and death, it was a horrible moment , I lost my mother by coming here. America for me was the best thing that could happen to me, here I was able to grow up without fear of any noise, I could never thank this country, it allowed me to escape death , thanks to this country i've had a normal adolescence, grow up and go to school, something I could never have done in Syria. A lot of people dreams about it , maybe you do not realize , but we have an incredible luck this country has given me incredible benefits, I have learned so much from here
I am so proud to have become an American citizen , I cannot say that thank you for everthing , to have offered me a better life and a future.
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Modifié par lucile83 le 30-10-2017 18:31
Réponse : Correction/graduation de gerondif, postée le 31-10-2017 à 14:41:40 (S | E)
Bonjour,
des erreurs de traduction à partir d'une trame française:
Hello everybody, my name is Tania and today it is a very special day because it is the graduation ceremony. I have to(plutôt must, have to exprime une corvée) tell you that I am extremely satisfied and proud of me (non, il faut le pronom réflechi, moi-même) because that was not still easy for me(traduction mot-à-mot de "ça n'a pas toujours été facile pour moi", ça ne va pas), I come from a country which knew (ou has known) the war. For those who do not know it I am of Syrian origin, I came in America when I was 12 years old , I would always remember (vous avez traduit un conditionnel, je me souiendrAIS toujours, à la place d'un futur, je me souviendrai toujours) the hardships I had to go through to get here. I could not grow up like other children, I lived in war, fear and death, it was a horrible moment , I lost my mother (by)(by indique un moyen, ing seul indique une simultanéïté) coming here. America for me was the best thing that could happen to me, here I was able to grow up without fear of any noise, I could never thank this country,(idem, vous vouliez dire je ne pourrAI jamais remercier assez ce pays au futur et vous avez traduit un conditionnel (pourrais), peut-être est-ce que un traducteur automatique a retranscrit votre errer de texte français) it allowed me to escape death , thanks to this country i've (majuscule) had a normal adolescence, (rupture de construction, vous venez de faire un present-perfect, Iv' had, donc soit vous continuez, soit vous parlez au prétérit, mais pas un infinitif sans rien autour)grow up and go to school, something I could never have done in Syria. A lot of people dreams(people est pluriel) about it , maybe you do not realize , but we have an incredible luck; (we are incredibly lucky. L'anglais préfère l'adjectif au nom pour I am hungry, thirsty, right, wrong, 12 years old,...) this country has given me incredible benefits(en Américain, ça signifie des remboursements sociaux, des avantages sur un contrat de travail), I have learned so much
I am so proud to have become an American citizen , I cannot say that thank you(pour traduire, je ne peux que dire merci, il ne faut pas utiliser cannot, car le verbe n'est pas négatif) for everything , to have offered(pour m'avoir offert = for offering me) me a better life and a future.
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